The structure of this is nice. Obvious bar lengths, broken into four bar segments. Only one over extended bar really caught my eye:

Cuz i'm surrounded by malevolent tyrants under the control of unbalanced hormones

Generally I believe it's best to try to have a range of syllables, if not exact amounts, for each bar. Obviously not all the time, but generally that tends to happen anyway. It stops overextending a bar, which could mess up the whole flow.

Content is DOPE. Imagery is on point. The thing I love about writing rap, is there is not other art for that allows you to get so much emotion out in such a short period of time, AND deliver a stunning message. I really dig the content in this and can't wait to read more.

The scheme is cool. You definitely understand end rhymes and slant rhymes. I can tell that this was actually thought through as a rap. I do wish I saw bit more of some multi-syllable schemes in there like this one

Because every time i stood up to defend my emancipation
It would start an altercation ending in facial dis figuration

Even just a few of those multiple rhymes per bar can take an OK verse to a GREAT verse.

This was completely on topic and loved it. Very very nice my man!

Thank you for participating!