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RE: Atlantic City

in #killerpoetry6 years ago

I like the way you use concrete imagery to present the surreal. It has a great effect. Like here:

Freedom never felt so sweet:
pulling the darkness from out my throat.

It gives the reader a clear image from which to pull the metaphor yet allows plenty of room for interpretation. Those lines in particular stood out to me. So did these:

Words were meant to be borne then buried in unmarked sands
where they can be felt, but not seen.

Perhaps it's kind of ironic that I perceive your writing style to be an unmasking of sorts in this arena.

Finally,

Silence is the cure for cancer;
Silence is the modern miracle.

These lines struck me like the others. In a world that constantly tells us to express our emotions, I find myself content to buck that ideology. While this has an affect on outward relationships, I find it much easier to resolve emotions internally. Nice write @carmalain.

Thanks for being a Block Chain Poet.

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In pieces like these, which are rooted in broken narratives for me, I try my best to give just enough information to show the reader what they need to know, like using pictures to storyboard a movie but never going beyond that. I'm a long winded writer, and early drafts always lose impact because of that, but I'm happy with the results when all those edits can bring me to a piece like this.

And yes, those last lines mean much and more; I definitely identify with you as an internal processor and rarely one to not take the personal time I need to be so.

Thank you for leading us Block Chain Poets, Moe, your support is exemplary, as is your writings.

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