MY DEATH IS IN THE TOMORROW THAT IS YET TO COME (SWC)

It feels so good sharing my diary to my fellow steemian. I really appreciate @jerrybanfield for giving me this opportunity. I guess for the main time, my mind would be at ease because i each time i remember that faithful day, I always feel i am a muderer. I hope i find peace one day

All i could hear when i first opened my eyes was the irritating sound of the siren from ambulances and fire-fighting trucks. At that moment, it seemed to me like the world was spining and i was almost giving up because i could not really feel my self breathing. I was still trying to picture what happened but my memories kept failing me. I could see people running helter-skelter but i could not place a finger on the reason why this was happening because apart from the siren, i could not hear any other thing. I tried standing up from the ground but i was just too weak to even move a finger so i remained there hoping someone would come help me.

After a while, i started hearing some voices slightly. "This one is still alive", immediately i heard this, it dawned on me that help was close but i could not still move an inch to ask for it. While i was still lying down hoping for help to come, I noticed some movement in my body like someone was touching me but i was not too concious to know what was going on. My guess was that It was the medical attendants that carried me to the ambulance because it was in there i finally gained conciousness after been attended to. It was at this point i knew what happened. I could see pieces of body on the floor, people were badly injured. Blood was flowing like a river. It was an appauling sight to behold.

I am a survival of the first bomb-blast attack that was carried out by the Boko- haram terrorist group which happened in nyanya Abuja. I live in karu, a neighbouring town beside Nyanya. That fateful day, i had to go do a little shopping in nyanya. I went along with a friend who happens to be my classmate. After shopping, we decided to stay put in order to watch a magical performance that was been staged by some groups of magicians. If only we had known, we would have left the market immediately we finished shopping. While we were enjoying the magic show, my friend told me she wanted to go ease her self so she left. Immediately she left, i got a call from home that my visitor was around and so i should come attend to him so i left the magic spot so as to go look for my friend. I had not taken up to seven steps when i got a total blackout as a result of the explosion.

My survival came as a shock to people because only myself and a little baby were the only survival in that vicinity. The effect of the blast was majorly felt at the magic spot because the bomb was placed in a car beside it. My testimony would have been complete only if my friend also survived the ordeal. According to the news i got, my friend got hit by a stone that flew to the air as a result of the blast. I could not hold my tears from falling, i was weeping like a baby. I was the one that forced my friend to go to the market with me so up till date, i still feel that guilt and i see her in my dreams at times. I could have been one of them. My blood could have been among the blood pool and by now the world might have forgotten that someone like me ever existed but up till this very moment that i write this experience, am still yet to find an answer to why i am still alive. But then this experience brought back my faith that there is actually someone out there that is watching over me and that person saved me. I think there is really an unseen God that is capable of doing all things.

I lost this belief of a God existing. I find it really hard to believe it when the pastor say there is a God that answers all prayers. I hated it when people say God did it for them. Although i was born into a christian home and i was brought up in the way of Christ Jesus but at the long run, it just seemed to me like we were just serving an unknown master that does not even know about our service. I might not be a die-hard worshipper of God but i could vouch for my mom.

Mummy was ready to do anything that her lord Jesus wanted

Could mummy be doing something wrong? What could she have done to deserve such punishment? I thought he was a forgiving God? I thought he doesn't watch his people suffer?
But why was her case different?
Ever since i knew my left from right, my mom has never gone through a whole day without passing through pains. She finds it really hard to wear cloth because she gets more hurt when she does that and when this pains go extreme, she has to get into hot water before she can be comfortable. For the past 20 years, she has been going to different hospitals but they are yet to give her a diagnosis of what is wrong in her body system. They keep telling her she was Ok but she was actually going through hell. In the past 20 years, i am very sure that if i were to calculate how many hours she has slept, it is barely upto 5 years but yet she keeps vigil praying to God to intervene in matter. She spends weeks in the house of God and also denying herself food just for God to intervene in her matter but nothing has been happening. She still kept steadfast hoping that God will intervene one day. As i grew up and watched my mother wallow in this pain, i began to lose faith in God and i finally zeroed the thought that there is a God from my heart.

But Lo and behold, when i thought i was done with him, he found me. It could only have been him that saved me from the bomb-blast because there is no science to explain my living today or could it be that I have nine lives? One thing i no for sure is that everything in life happens for a reason and there are some mystries that we cannot just contend with so i guess i will just keep them and wait till i get to meet my creator because i have a lot of questions to ask.

Thanks for reading