Girl X

I will tell you a story. About a girl. Let's call her Girl X.

Why?

She is not special, she is not beautiful, she is not talented. Just random, grey, boring girl, so she doesn't need to have a name.

Every day she goes on a rocky road between mountain and precipice. The road is narrow, she needs to watch her steps. She has walked so many times that road but it is slippery and she stumbles, even if she knows she should be careful. Cold wind sometimes pushes her toward the precipice. The girl shakes, trying to catch her balance.

I will be ok, I got this, she thinks. Going up and up along the uphill. She tries to run, maybe it will help her to resist the pushing wind. It starts to rain and the wind is so strong.

I got this, I got this, she thinks. I claimed that high I just can't lose.
But then, she put her foot on the stone. It was wet and slippery. She staggered and her body could no longer hold her in balance. She just had to surrender to the wind.

Landing on a rock shelf. she looks at her road last time.

Tomorrow I'm going to climb there, but now I have to get some rest. Here it is cold and dark, but comfortable.

Time has passed.

How long am I laying here? I don't really know. But I don't have to get up today. I don't have to claim today. I can stay here a little longer... I can stay here a little longer. Now I need to let myself to sleep for a little longer. I got this.
Does she look for excuses or is she unable to stand alone, again?

If you meet her, don't judge her. Just pick her up.
Give her a name. Tell her the truth. She survived all this wind for so long.
And now She needs your help to get back on her path.

Hello Steemit!

As you may guess, the text above is about me. And the storyline of my life. I was the lucky one, I met someone who pulled me and helped me to stand on my path again. I don't need to run anymore.
After a severe nervous breakdown and addiction to various substances, I am learning how to live again.
I'm learning how to stand on my own feet and who I really am.
I share my journey & thoughts mainly on Instagram, but decided to try also here.
So if you want to join me, I will be very pleased but remember, way to recovery isn't easy, isn't beautiful and full of roses. It's ugly, it's full of struggle, it's full of pain and very intimate.
And today I may say I'm feeling like myself again. So it's worth it.

Steemit, I hope to stay longer and get to know you better!
Painters' Child
Susan