Intro: Have you ever gone exploring only to get lost?

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Have you ever been lost in a fair? In an amusement park? A marketplace? Or perhaps in a shopping center? You might be wondering why I'm asking such questions in a post tagged as introduceyourself. Well, it's because steemit, to me, is an entirely new territory full of different booths and stores.

I admit, I spent some unknown amount of time considering what to write in this introduction. It almost felt as if I'm the new kid in school all over again.

"Hi, I'm Kris."

And then I'm stuck. What can one say beyond that? So here I was, a little lost in an awkward imaginary introduction. But then, I found myself drifting towards the reason why I'm here and how I found this community and I realized, that's my introduction. Beyond a name, a story is always a good identifier of who you are and who you could be. And so, my narrative began in my head.

I like to write. It helps me cope and whenever I let myself write (or read) a particular guilty pleasure called fanfiction, I'm happy. I was in fifth grade when I attempted my first poetry but that was it. It wasn't until two years later did I attempt a silly short story that I never got to finish anyway. Years later, I discovered the joys of reading fanfiction and eventually tried my hand at writing some for a time. It was a good diversion from some unavoidable stresses in life. I liked that world. It was like being in a fair and standing close to a booth you've deemed as your favorite.

But then, instead of having the kind of companions who cheered you on, I had people who always told me it wasn't worth my time. Not the fanfiction per se but writing as a whole. "You won't get rich from that," I was told often enough that I resorted to sneaking about the house in the middle of the night and typing away at the family's (personal) computer.

People I didn't know would leave me reviews and the happiness I got from those interactions made all the scolding I got worth it. The reviews weren't all praises, mind you, but they made me happy still. Eventually however, it got harder to find time to indulge myself and I simply drifted away from that world. It was a slow drift, not updating my stories as often anymore. Then, life happened.

I'm a spoonie. I recently learned of that term in a blogging group. Before that, I simply say I'm sick. I have an autoimmune condition but I suppose that's another story altogether. But it's worth mentioning here because the grueling years of being in and out of the hospital and the medications that came with a multitude of side effects made me desperate for a respite.

I joined support groups and saw mentions of anti-depressants from other members. Not wanting to add new medication, I rediscovered my love for reading fanfiction.

I was surprised to find that throughout the years, I still had messages from reviewers there every now and then but I simply couldn't write anymore. I haven't written for a long time and those stories in my mind had stuttered to a halt long ago. I did try to write a handful of times when I'd get the random message of someone still hoping I'd continue. Even a friend who liked reading pocketbooks told me to write again. But it was difficult to write stories when you often had to go to the hospital.

However, I felt like bursting and I wanted an outlet. Eventually, I read about blogging from someone in one of the many support groups I joined. I looked it up, joined blogging groups, lurked about, and was confused with all the 'build your website' portion enough to look for alternatives. Lo and behold, I discovered that community blogging existed! And as if it was truly meant to be, someone mentioned a blogging community they were posting in.

For days, I mulled about joining. Weren't there a certain tone and structure used for blogging? Do I just go about conversationally? How do one go about blogging without a specialty anyway?

Despite my qualms, I posted an entry because it was a memorable month for me. It was around Christmas last year when I mustered enough courage to post. The following year, I only managed poems and it was a struggle to write when every week, I'd be in the hospital. So a few poems later, I stopped writing again.

Months later, I visited the group associated with that blog and read a post of some people trying different platforms. Someone mentioned steemit and I decided to try a new community out. I had to wait for a verification and when it came a few days later, I only ever had the chance to finish signing up.

Now, here I am, near a similar booth in that fair again, trying to write. Yes, I won't get rich and most likely wouldn't even get money at all. But hey, it'll hopefully make me happy. Even if it's only for a bit, a smidgen of happiness is better than nothing at all.

Do I have a niche? No, I probably do not; I'm still sorting through my head. But even so, I'd like to enjoy my time here, getting lost in visiting booths (stories/niches) and learning from the many bloggers here. After all, isn't exploring (and discovering and making new friends!) the best adventure you can have in a fair?

If you've read this far, kudos to you and I certainly hope my fair/amusement park reference didn't offend anyone. I simply am without awesome ideas to use (but those places are always fun).

So... Hi, I'm Kris. What's your booth?