I am sorry that you have to go through that. That's part of the problem with pharmas, they do indeed work, its the way that they work that causes neurotoxicity. That and these chemicals weren't meant to be long-term solutions! If you ever get an opportunity to try cannabis, I would take it, personally. However your safety comes first, and if doing so puts you in danger in any way (government kidnapping/murdering you, in the case of the Philippines) I might not risk it myself depending on your location.
Maybe you can find other alternatives going through my future posts. :)