Opening up a new page in life after a dark and difficult journey

in #introduceyourself4 years ago (edited)

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Today I was finally able to sell my portion of the office building pictured above. This really marks the beginning of a new chapter in my life. I really haven’t properly introduced myself, so I guess this could be as good of an opportunity to do so as any. This is a true story.

So, how did I end up owning/working at this office building? Some 4,5 years ago my father made a suggestion to me about buying the office building, because he wanted to retire. “It’s not much work, all you’ll need to do is sit back and collect the rent, you can continue your studies and hobbies at the same time”, he said.

At that time I was starting my studies of economics at the university in Jyväskylä, and training kickboxing at least 5 times a week. Here’s one of my victorious fights from that period, it’s against an Estonian guy in Baltic Open 2013:

So, regarding the office building, in the beginning it seemed like everything was going great. The only negative side seemed to be the paperwork and the seemingly unnecessary and frustrating finnish bureaucracy I had to deal with occasionally.

As to my economics studies in the university - I was very quickly disillusioned. The mathematical models and in general the way the subject was taught was very “ideological”, I would say. It seemed like simple things were obfuscated on purpose to hide the simple truth of economic exploitation by the money creators, that is the banking system and it’s owners. It was during that time I invested a little bit in Bitcoin as a protest against the banking system. The unfortunate thing was I had my few Bitcoins at Mt. Gox, and after what happened.. never saw them again.

The office building my dad had aquired and transmitted to me is located near the border of Finland and Russia in a small town Tohmajärvi, where my dad’s family is from. A big part of the building is used as a motel, mostly for Russians travelling to Finland. A Russian guy and his mom were running the motel in partnership with me and my dad. So, when the EU sanctions against Russia started due to the Ukraine crisis, the Russian tourists stopped coming and I was getting into financial difficulties. To add insult to injury, the taxation authorities did some really despotic decisions like increasing the real-estate tax 150% even though the real value of the building was lower than ever!

Please, don’t worry, I’ll spare you the whole sob-story. Disappointments, difficulties and hardships - we’ve all had them. And we’re all still alive. I’m just trying to give a condensed story about what happened.

So, I was getting super stressed out. Everything seemed to go against me and all the work was cumulating. It seemed like I had only responsibilities, and no freedom. I wasn’t enjoying the university, and even the kickboxing was starting to feel like forced performing. And at the same time I was constantly worrying about the office building - which was located almost 400km away from where I lived -and my financial situation. Something had to change. So I made the, perhaps slightly desperate decision to quit everything, the University, the kickboxing, and move to the office building to become a full-time entrepreneur.

Everybody said I was crazy. My friends, my parents. They couldn’t understand why I would do such a thing. Perhaps I didn’t understand it myself, it was an intuition. I was living at a student one-room apartment, what we often call a “suicide studio”, as an example of typical dark finnish humour. So I was thinking: “What the heck am I doing here? Why am I paying rent for this crappy apartment in the city, when I could be living in my own office building and near nature.

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“I could have a whole new life, I could succeed as an entrepreneur and have the whole building full of people, I could organise events, I could make epic marketing campaigns, I could build a giant business empire I could do anything!” I thought. And I guess now everything is more possible than ever, just not with the building.

Well, to make a long-story short, I was faced with many setbacks, the roof started to leak in several places, my dad who had helped me with the technical aspects of the building management was getting very grumpy and wanted to retire, it was very cold, and dark, and I was in a new place and was being treated very coldly by the people here. And then, as a
final straw that broke the camel's back - pizzagate happened.

In case you weren’t following the development of that story during the final stages of the American presidential campaign, the Wikileaks-released emails of Hillary Clinton’s campaign chairman John Podesta really opened up a can of worms. A true pandora’s box of horrors was opened and discovered by a massive open-source investigation, dots were connected and the big picture revealed was truly horrifying. Human trafficking, pedophilia, satanic occultism - and I’m saying this as someone who has researched this stuff now for literally hundreds of hours - are an absolute epidemic in the highest echelons of society. The catholic church, the British royal family, the political elite in Washington DC, it’s in France, in Belgium - satanic rituals and pedophilia are everywhere where there is power. This is what Stanley Kubrick was also telling us in his final movie “Eyes Wide Shut”. He suspiciously died shortly after finishing the film.

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Ok you may have your differing opinion about this, the mainstream media has smeared pizzagate as “fake news” and “debunked”, but actually it’s true, and hasn’t been debunked at all. In fact what seems to most confirm that real criminality has been revealed, is the cover-up and the distortion of the mainstream media. But let’s return to my story.

My financial situation was only getting worse. I was literally having nightmares about Hillary Clinton’s associates raping children and torturing me “for eternity” in the dream, waking up with cold sweat. Everything was so dark I began to have suicidal thoughts. I couldn’t focus on the business, I couldn’t focus on anything, I couldn’t deal with daily tasks I was so depressed. I was getting out of shape, my physical, mental and social health were all deteriorating. Just some two years ago I ran half-marathon (21km) in less than 1,5 hours - now I was getting exhausted walking up the stairs (ok not quite, but almost).

I was just waiting for arrests to come, I really believed the thing had been exposed to so many people that there would be no way to put the genie back in the bottle so to speak. It was all around the alternative media, on all the forums. How could it not lead to the collapse of the pedo-elite? Well, that story is not yet over, but there’s only so much a single person can do about it.

When the long finnish winter was beginning to pass and the light and warmth of the sun was returning, so life began to return to my body and mind. I was still alive.

About two weeks ago I started posting here on Steemit. I teamed up with lazariko12 and we started the awesome Steemvoter exchange with a lot of inspiring people. Even the motel was starting to do better in the summer and my financial difficulties were easing. And, now, finally, after years of trying to find a buyer for the building, one of the tenants who has a construction company, agreed to buy my share of the building - dirt cheap, but with all the problems and renovations coming in the building it was reasonable. So now I can finally sigh a sigh of relief. SIGH

So, what now? Right now everything is open - in a good way. One thing is for sure: I need to go traveling. I’ll be posting updates of my travels here on steemit.

Second thing: Investing in cryptocurrencies and related matters to fight corrupt central bank dominance.

Third: Building a network here on Steemit, check-out our project here:
https://steemit.com/steemit/@pavezi/steemvoter-exchange-news-and-philosophy-upvote-support-for-new-users-available.

Third thing: producing more content, this time with some serious quality. I’ve got so much to say, and I’m only getting started. I would love to get to know you, and in general as many people as possible here on Steemit and really contribute something to the community.

So, if you’re going through some tough times like I was during the last winter, don’t give up, keep fighting and eventually things will get better. No matter how bad it gets, avoid becoming bitter and hateful, and blaming others - those feelings and the associated thoughts lead to a downward spiral towards a hellish existence.

After the winter - summer comes. After the night - a new dawn arises. Keep up the good work.

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very nice posting. I love it.

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What's up man? Where do I even start. Firstly, I can definitely relate to the struggle. It's what builds resilience but the hardest part is being patient and trusting the process. This past year, we lost a child, moved abruptly from our household, and have been making the adjustments to regain stability in our lives. At the same time, we've lost support from my fiance's side of the family only adding more rough emotions to an already intensified situation. There family always had something to say about me being an entrepreneur and not an indentured wage servant. Despite this, I have an amazing partner in my life that trusts and believes in the vision we have for the future but presently it looks bleek. It's difficult to stay focused on the future without appearing cold or distant from family who needs me the most.

In regards to the esoteric element of your post, I'd like to say that I've learned anything or anyone that you fear or provokes a response from you is in CONTROL of your life. This is why the occult and all of the jazz that goes with it can really mess people up if they're not emotionally/mentally able to digest their own reflection. Yes, the evil in the world is a reflection of themselves. However, all of the scare tactics, i.e. the illuminati boogie man has really done a number on humanity's consciousness. Idk where you stand on spirituality, but I firmly believe that this is spiritual warfare and much of the big bad woof image of the occult is merely scare tactics discouraging people like you and me to ACTIVATE. Still, I strongly believe that WE are in control of the future once we REALIZE our power and focus on making a change. This is what makes block chain, open sourced, decentralized, transparent doctrines are all of the rage. This is why people DEMANDED clean energy, clean food and guess what now we DEMAND CLEAN MONEY!!! #thecleanse

Thanks a lot for the response. My troubles seem small and insignificant when compared to losing a child. So all the strength and endurance to you and your fiance.

As to the occult and spirituality, it's obviously a very large topic so I'll only touch upon it briefly. So the occult or hidden body of knowledge can be used for good and evil, and the occultists themselves talk about black and white magic and make a distinction between them. It's just knowledge, and basic philosophical principles and what I would call thinking-tools, like for example the magic rituals can be seen as just goal-oriented, intentional acts to achieve some goal, or to focus one's consciousness or energies to achieving the outcome in reality.

In some sense all "occultism" is bad though, because it's not open, it's not about the public use of reason and sharing knowledge, but hiding it. And in ancient times I guess there was a good reason for the mystery schools to guard the advanced knowledge this way from people considered "profane". But on the other hand by hiding knowledge from others the occultists (the powerful secret societies) have been creating a power-differential between themselves and those not-in-the-know. In ancient times, and even more recently it was the priesthood would mentally enslave the populations this way, giving one exoteric teaching to the masses while keeping the esoteric knowledge for themselves.

But what you say about scare tactics is true. That's why they're putting all the symbols and stuff in to music videos and public performances, and movies and stuff. To mess with people's heads, especially to mess with the "truthers". As to what this darkest phenomenon of human sacrifice, pedophilia, etc. is really all about, I'm not sure. History is rife with examples of this, and it's still going on. Some people say it's done by the intelligence agencies, and that nobody really believes in any weird dark occult religion, but I don't know. It very well could be that they really believe they're getting power from some dark entity. Also what is called "possession" is a frequent phenomenon in history, both possession by "good spirits", like Socrates' daemon which was more like a voice of conscience, the Christian spirit etc. but also bad ones. Maybe it's all in the mind, but it's still something real as a phenomenon.

But, yeah, I guess Nietzsche said it well that those who fight monsters better watch out so that they won't become monsters themselves. And that if you gaze in to the darkness, the darkness might start gazing back at you. I think that when I was really delving in to the rabbit hole and trying to figure out what makes these people tick, I was somehow infected with that darkness.

There exists a real consciousness of darkness and sadism and psychopathy in this world, but it's just extremely disturbing to focus one's mind on it. So yeah I definitely want to encourage people to do their own research in to these subjects and take the red pill and see how far the rabbit hole goes, but remember to look after your mental health and a balance in your life.

As to what you say about realizing our power, open source and transparency: right on! The cleanse is coming! :D thanks for the comment.

I was literally reading Aristotle's take on "natural slavery" and that he believes that slavery is not only just but beneficial for both parties (slave and master). It seems that people of the past, those that attended mystery schools eventually turned into ruling class members attending private universities while giving everyone childish interpretations of truths such as personality worship in modern religions without understanding the symbolism behind it. Still, not everyone has the desire to "question popular explanations" and it seems as if many are destined to be slaves based on their desire for excessive pleasure and ignorance. Of course there are many other factors that come into play such as social disparities, economic policies that discourage social mobility, etc. Nonetheless, hoarding knowledge is destructive and ultimately all truth comes to light and this is why their creation of the internet from the military industrial complex was bittersweet. It brought and continues to bring forth further elements of the totality of this reality and some of it is centered around darkness. Hopefully people can understand the trick of the devil. The devil can't force you to do anything but instead develops an environment that discourages empowerment. Have you looked into the "devil" card in the Tarot deck?

Yes, in the card the shackled slaves could lift up their shackles at anytime. You know what's up, we're in this fight together and we'll stay in touch. Sry for the long answer-delay I was sleeping

it's all good.

Welcome to Steem @pavezi I have upvoted and sent you a tip

Welcome to Steemit ! happy to have you here. Followed. Follow me back 😘

Dude, awesome! I had nightmares about Hillary too, and for some weird reason fun dreams hanging out with Donald! Welcome to Steemit, following

Great post man.
You have to always be positive and hope for the best.

I'm happy that things are starting to look up for you, hopefully steemit and being part of the community working together will make things even better =)

Welcome to steemit!
@zebbad

Thanks a lot zebbad

Awesome post man, you went through some tough stuff. Keep up the good spirits!

thanks man, will do

Fanstatic introduction pavezi, you have a good head on your shoulders.

Thanks livingwaters, followed! :D

Pavezi - welcome to steemit. Hope you will enjoy ! All the best @digital-gypsy

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I am still new here, and people seem to be happy to answer questions. Welcome!

Welcome to Steemit Pavezi :) Glad to see more people like you - here joining Steemit! Nice post, i will follow your account, please follow me at @mekong

Thanks for sharing your story @pavezi. I just did my first post last night, so I am really new. I already love it here and am so excited. I think that it is a very positive emotional space to share and make friends, too. I am sorry that you had a bad time, but I am very glad that things are better now. Good things are coming for you!!

Hello @Pavezi
welcome to Steemit ! If you like sportsbetting have a look at my blog bwin:)

Nice, a new Steemian, more or less ^^ Hello Pavezi I hope you have fun at this place. feel free to contact or follow me at any time :-) Cheers @chrisx

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