You define who you are. Do not allow the words and actions of others to define you.

We all have had friends or others who have mentioned unkind and mean words to us. Their actions, don’t even go there. The question is should we bother about their opinions of us and the way they behave to us? My answer would be that if those people are the ones very close to us then we should sit down and ponder about it. However, if those comments were from others that we barely know and are not very close to us then we should not bother.

I used to let people define me and when I behaved the otherwise they said “this is not you”, “you have changed”, “mixing around with the wrong people” and so on and so forth. However, in reality they had an image of me, which was in fact the reflection of themselves. It had nothing to do with me. Similarly, the way I interpret their actions is a reflection of myself. I mentioned above that if those people were close to us then we would sit and ponder. I did that, yet it got me away from myself and I fell into what they thought I was. Sometimes even the closet people do not know us. How will they know, if we do not who we are deep down and they do not know themselves. If you know who you are deep down, if you are aware of your being then whatever people say or do to you should not affect your cognition of who you are. It cannot affect because you are well aware of who you are.

Nevertheless, I still do listen to the opinions of others about me. I listen to them but I do not take it personally. I do ponder about it and if I feel they were right then I make changes but if I feel otherwise I do not bother. I take their opinions and I see it from a 3rd party point of view, which means there is person A (1st) stating his/her opinion about me (2nd) and there is me seeing myself as if it is someone else (3rd). When I do this, I am able to see if that opinion is something that I should take personally and alter myself or if it is nonsense and I should not bother. The comments and actions of others does not define me. The actions of others shows how they are as humans. If someone behaves in a bad manner to you it solely reflects themselves. Don’t take whatever they do or say personally. What I mean by that is that do not let their words and actions define your thinking of who you are. They may say good or bad things, you may seem invisible to them, they can be a hell of ignorant and unconscious being but never let them define who you are.

You are not here to be the person who others want you to be or see you as. You are here to know who you are, to realize your true being. Get to know yourself, embrace and love yourself and no one can have the power to make you feel otherwise. You introduce yourself to yourself.

Something to ponder about:
Do we really need to define ourselves? In the process of defining ourselves, are we limiting ourselves?