Homeopathy is a regulatory dodge - Buyers beware.

I suspect most people reading this realize that homeopathy is entirely fraudulent, but I ran into homeopathy in a surprising place today (that I'm not going to explain because it's of zero importance), so I'm going to write this anyway.

I want to begin plainly: if you are right now thinking something to the effect of "Well, my favorite homeopathic remedy works for me! (as something other than a placebo)" or "Well, my chiropractor swears by this homeopathic remedy so I use it", I'd like you to come to terms with something:

In order to believe that "remedy" is doing something useful, you must completely abandon all belief in the reality of the scientific method, 9th grade chemistry, dose-response curves, and arithmetic.

Let's begin: first - homeopathic active ingredients in most cases have on any of the conditions or symptoms they are purported to treat. If this seems shocking, then I urge you to look up "homeopathic provings". If, after reading, that voodoo still seems sensible to you, then it's time to switch to magic crystals, witch-doctors, and voodoo-dolls.

But rather than talk about any particular ingredients, I want to address some very, very basic chemistry and some very straight-forward arithmetic.

When you look on a homeopathic package and see "strength: 30X" or "strength: 50X" or "Strength: 200C", those numbers are describing repeated dilutions. For instance, if an active ingredient is listed as a strength of 30X, the process is to take some amount of it, dilute it (typically with water, sugar, lactose, or grain alcohol) at a ratio of 1-part-in-10, then to take a sample of that diluted solution, dilute it at 1-part-in-10 again, and repeat this for a total of 30 times.

At the end of that, you have a dilution of the "active ingredient" that is 1 part in 1-followed-by-30-zeros.

Let's take a closer look at that, using carbon as our "active ingredient" (just as an example).

If you remember 9th grade chemistry and have a calculator handy, it's simple to show that 10^24 atoms of carbon weigh about 20 grams. (That's roughly the weight of two AAA batteries). It's a pile of carbon that would fit neatly into the palm of your hand. In order to get 10^30 grams of carbon, we would need a million (10^6) of those piles, for a net total weight of 20 million grams... which is 20 metric tons.

So if we started with 20 metric tons of carbon, and we put it through the series of dilutions to render it a "homeopathic strength" of 30X... we would have precisely one single atom of carbon remaining. Let me say that again: in order to have even a single atom remaining in a "homeopathic 30X strength" dilution of carbon, we would have to start with 20 metric tons of the stuff.

Let's look at a common homeopathic remedy, Oscillococcinum. (Which is a fancy word for "magic juju that pretends to be made from duck liver"). It claims a homepathic strength of "200CK".

When we see a C or CK (instead of an X) in a "homeopathic strength", it means the serial dilutions were 1 part in 100 instead of 1 part in 10. There's a simple conversion though to get from C (or CK) to X: multiply by 2. So a 30C dilution is the same as 60X, a 50C dilution is the same as 100X, a 200C dilution is the same as 400X, etc)

That 200CK "strength" is equivalent to 400X. Let's take a closer look at that.

There are approximately 10^80 molecules in the observable universe. That is, if every single molecule in the universe were (instead of mostly hydrogen or helium) a molecule of duck-liver, an 80X dilution would result in exactly 1 molecule remaining. An 81X dilution would require starting with 10 entire universes to have a single molecule remaining. An 82X dilution would require starting with 100 entire universes to have a single molecule remaining.

And a 400X dilution would require starting with 1-followed-by-320-zeros entire universes made entirely of duck liver to have even a single molecule remaining.

With just a couple of exceptions, those homeopathic remedies you swear by... are a complete and utter fraud.

Here's the exception: remember when I mentioned that these non-existent "active ingredients" were being diluted in some sort of "inactive ingredient"? Occasionally, that "inactive ingredient" can have an effect (and that effect might be good or bad)

Two obvious examples: I looked at "homeopathic" burn-creams that everyone (including doctors) swears is useful for aiding in the healing of burns and keeping the skin supple during the healing process. The packages claim that the "active" ingredient is marigolds. (No, there's not particular reliable evidence that marigolds will keep your skin supple while burns heal). "What was the inactive ingredient?" you ask? In one case it was petroleum jelly, and in the other case it was garden-variety skin lotion... both of which are well known to soften skin.

Another example to be aware of: I know of at least one homeopathic cold remedy sold over-the-counter in a major drugstore chain that is straight-up 40 proof grain alcohol. (And no, you don't have to be 21 to purchase it)

If you're buying "homeopathic" remedies, the manufacturer is taking advantage of your naivete and unfamiliarity with exponential functions in order to rip you off. If your chiropractor is foisting homeopathic "remedies" on you, he's either a quack who couldn't pass an 8th grade algebra quiz, or he's lying to you intentionally.