Toxic Relationships || 21-02-2023
Hello friends in this beautiful community, am happy to be here...well this is actually my first time posting in this community in a long while. Nevertheless I feel at home being here. I hope you feel the same way about my visit because am here to stay...lols
The topic for this contest hosted by one of those I admire on the platform,@chant caught my attention and I felt it okay to contribute my two cents to the subject matter. I hope you all find my entry interesting....let enjoy this ride together.
 |
|---|
In a lay man's understanding, the word toxic means something harmful. In biology it means poison. Now relating it with the main topic of discussion, it means harmful or unhealthy relationship.
I can also stress this to say that it's a kind of relationship where you are not being treated well either as the male or the female in the relationship.
What am saying in essence is that either of the party (male or female) could be on the receiving end. I know there is this common believe that it's only the lady that suffers more in a toxic relationship but the fact is either of them can suffer or be a victim.
It's really very difficult to spot a toxic relationship form the onset because every relationship tend to start on a very high emotional feeling of love and most times we get so carried away in the euphoria of that strong feeling.
Now the initial strong feeling of love is not the issue, the issue is when you discover that the relationship is becoming unhealthy and toxic and still stay in there even when it's life threatening.
I've not been into one myself but I've been with people who have found themselves in this kind of relationship. The stories of these people seems quite similar in the sense that they all started on a good note but things started getting beyond control over time.
Some of these people are being physically abused by their so called partners, they are also being cheated on unapologetically because the relationship had gone sour. The worst part of it is that those suffering from this are not being accepted by their partner neither are their partner ready to let them go. That's cruel and selfish.
One of these people still complained about this to me today. The guys seems not to be satisfied with her any longer yet he is not comfortable seeing her around any other guy. From my little discussion with the lady, I got to know they've been battling with trust issue which led to many things and to the point it is now.
Did you just say cope? Can a coal of fire be in your bossom and still maintain your cool? Can you have a poison in your stomach and feel alright?
Well I guess your answer is an emphatic "NO". What is toxic is already toxic, sometimes remaining there would even irritate some partners more. It's seems to them that they are done with you.
This is the reason why LOVE is not always enough, I wish it were, I wish that feeling of butterflies in your bellies remain till eternity but it's cut short within a very short period of time. Commitment is what is expected to get the relationship going at this point but many fail at this point.
Feeling changes with time and even with circumstances. You know, this moment you want to see him or her and then the next minute you don't want to...smiles. That's what's feeling does and because this is not well managed, it degenerates into a toxic relationship.
Do not ignore sign and red flags, you're not to be blamed initially but your to be blamed eventually when you ignore red flag such as
shutting you up when you're making and opinion even in public
verbally & physically abusing you claiming it's some kind of mistake
Unnecessarily comparing you with other people as a lady or a guy.
And the list goes on... Take note of these things and weigh your options, relationship like these are time bomb waiting to explode. Yea!
Well I am not a relationship councellor but I can give a counsel based on my little knowledge about this matter. I would say if you at any point find yourself in a toxic relationship, do well to break off first. It's still a relationship and not marriage, it would have been difficult for me to say this if the person in question is married.
It's better to break off while you're in a relationship because if you cope or manage it into marriage, it will become hell on earth for you instead of heaven on earth. Truly everyone deserves to be treated like a queen and king in a relationship but when it's the opposite, do well to separate and evaluate your self.
Be sure you're not the cause and then give room to see if your partner changes for good, if not totally end it and leave your experiences in the past. Teachability is one thing that must be looked out for when in a relationship. If your partner is not teachable ,do not submit and can't bend then there is an issue.
It means no matter how much you want him to see what is wrong he won't and this are not healthy sign for a promising future.
We all deserve better when it comes to relationship, no one is suppose to suffer for accepting another. There is a level you should decide to go in accepting people's excesses. When you weigh it and see that it would escalate in the nearest future, please do well to use the exit.
Someone who will understand you and accept you inspite of your flaws would surely come for you. You do not need to manage when there is someone who you can truly enjoy till the end. Let me rest my case here.
Thanks for coming this far with me, I really appreciate it. I also hope you got value from this piece. Feel free to share with me what you think in the comment section. Gracias!
Regards
@lhorgic♥️
TEAM 5 CURATORS
This post has been upvoted through steemcurator08. We support quality posts anywhere and with any tags.
Curated by: @eliany
Thanks so much @eliany...