#club100 // How Traditional Marriage is Done in My Village (Pinyin, Santa-Sub Division) by @chant

Introduction

Hello friends on the steemit platform, accept warm greetings from @chant. Today, I will be talking about the traditional marriage I attended and the various activities that are done before handing over the bride to the husband’s family. I will like readers to understand that marriage rites differ from family to family and tribe.

In some families or tribes, they do not request many items but some families request based on the level of education of the bride or her occupation. Notwithstanding, for my case, that was not considered but I think there were still demands for more. In my village, a women’s bride price is not paid all at once but it is something that never has a stop limit. Your children will continue to pay and even your children’s children each time there is a traditional rite to be performed.

What Happened on the Eve of the Marriage.

On the eve of the marriage, only the bride's family members and close friends assembled in the bride’s family house. All preparations are done on this day, rehearsals by the bridesmaids, frying of pastries and packing, arranging firewood that will be used to cook, arranging chairs, etc.

It should be noted that the level of preparations on the eve of the marriage will determine if it will be a failure or a success. So, much of the work is done on the eve of the marriage.

The Day of the Marriage

On this day, the bride’s family had a responsibility to cook food to welcome the groom’s family and guests. One of the main dishes is the traditional meal which is “achu” with yellow soup. This is one the tedious work as it requires more energy and money to buy the items for the meal. Without this dish on the menu, it means that the marriage was not good 😊.

_{Pounding the Achu, made up of cocoyams and green bananas}

Early in the morning, while the cooking is ongoing, the bride and maids are in a room where the hairstylist and makeup artist are adding beauty to them. Some people will ask why so early in the morning. We all know how makeup takes time and the occasion proper begins at 11:00 am due to security reasons. In the past, marriage rites were done at night but this is no longer the case.

By midday, those cooking have completed their work and are kept in a room. The bride and maids were set but the bride is kept in a room with her mothers and the maids are in another room. By this time, the groom's family arrived and was seated under the canopies with other guests.

At this moment, the bride cannot come outdoor until when all marriage rites are done. Now the occasion has just started. The father of the bride will welcome everyone and then ask the groom’s family their intentions to be made known because he does not know why they are in his compound. Note that this is just the traditional way of doing it not that he did not know why they are in his compound.

_{Bride’s father asking for the intentions of the groom’s family in his compound}

The groom’s family now will let their intentions known. One funny thing about this is that they will not just say, we are here to marry your daughter. On this day, the groom’s family said on their way to the market, they saw a healthy plantain and asked where it was coming from. They were told it was from this compound and they have decided to come and plead for a seedling of that plantain to plant in their compound and enjoy it as well. The bride’s father will now say, he has different species so they will need to go and show him which of them. Now, both families will go indoors to start with the traditional rites.

I cannot say what was going on inside but what I know is that those concerned had to receive money from the groom’s family. The amounts are not made public that is why they had to go indoors and do everything first. After this, the groom’s family now requests for their wife. Following tradition, the bride was supposed to be covered with other maids and the groom identify the bride among the three covered from head to toe. But recently, the groom’s family had to pay some money for this not to be done due to time-consuming of the process.

Presenting the Bride to the Groom’s Family and Guests.

After performing all marriage rites, the bride is presented to the groom’s family and guests. This was done outdoor due to the large crowd present. The bridesmaid danced and ushered the bride outside.

_{The bridesmaids ushered the bride outdoor}

The bride’s father had to take a cup of palm wine brought by the groom’s family and asked the daughter if he should accept the drink. The daughter will accept and then the father asked her to take the cup dance around and show the husband. She takes it round accompanied by her maids searching for where the husband was seated. When she arrived there, she knelt and gave the cup to the husband. The husband takes the cup, drank all the palm wine, and then put money in the cup, and they both danced to the bride’s father and handed the cup.

From here, they danced back to their seat as a couple. In the past, the cake was not used during a traditional marriage but modernization has come in and now cake cutting has been added. The MC now invites the couple to unveil their cake and cut it, showing the public how they will feed each other while at home. Later, dance to their favorite song😀😀.

_{The couple feeding each other with the cake}

Presentation of Gifts

As I earlier said, modernization has come in and changed a lot that was done in the past. In the past, this was not considered but today, this is one of the most exciting moments during a traditional marriage. Family and friends cannot wait for this moment to dance and present their gifts.

This is the moment that friends and families will have the opportunity to dance greet the couple and present their gifts. It is at this moment that the couple can easily identify who was present and who was not present 😁😁.

_{Présentation of gifts}

It is done in order, for instance, the bride’s family is first called up to present their gifts. The groom’s family is second and then friends, colleagues, and guests. The bride’s maids come in last to close the presentation of gifts.

Eating and Drinking

This was one of the long-awaited moments for some people lol 😂. They could not wait for the MC to pronounce it was time to eat. The couple had to lead because it is their day. They opened the table and dishes their food, and the bride’s maid followed.

The protocol had to be respected if not some hungry individuals might finish the food within a twinkle of an eye.

While the eating and drinking are ongoing, people are distracted and the groom’s family secretly takes the bride away.

Even after performing traditional rites, the bride’s sisters and brothers are still not satisfied so are waiting to hold back their sister until they are given a satisfactory sum of money before they can allow the bride to go😁. But because they were distracted with food and drinks, the bride was secretly taken away. The marriage celebration will continue in the groom’s house.

Conclusion

To conclude, I will say, this was what was done during the marriage I attended last week. It was a great event to witness with a lot of tradition lol 😂. One good thing is that no matter how hard the bride’s family demands, both families always come to an amicable settlement. In some families, things are complicated to the extent that the groom’s family will behave as if they will quit but because the groom loves the bride, love conquers all and in the end, the bride is handed to him.