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A warm greeting to the entire Latin community! On this occasion, I am taking part in the fourth-week challenge of season 12, titled "In black and white."

I chose... white

Are you a supporter of optimism and self-confidence?

Soon approaching my 39th birthday, I realize that my self-confidence has been there for a long time, or rather that I no longer pay too much attention to the opinions of others.

In my youth and adolescence, I was of a very calm and helpful nature. The opinion of my friends and those around me was paramount. I didn't want others to have a bad image of me. I was very sociable and never had a problem making friends. My interests revolved around general topics like soccer, girls, and video games.

Over time, I realized that no matter what you do, you will always be criticized by someone. I already knew it, but I really felt it when it was loved ones who disappointed me. Sometimes I was asked for favors not because I had the ability, but because I had trouble saying no. From the age of 17, I began to be interested in my human relationships and in philosophy. Every time I had a moment of doubt, I would dive back into the study to understand “why”.

The gaze of others is a necessary burden, especially at school, but we must get rid of it as soon as we start to think about what it brings us: a lack of self-confidence. We cannot control the thoughts of others, they have the right to think what they want about us.

Of course, we are all sensitive to other people's opinions to some extent (for example, if my friend tells me my t-shirt is ugly). However, we should not allow the comments and remarks of others to limit our freedom.

In my view, people who make contradictory judgments are not well placed to do so. I only listen to those who seek to understand my approach before giving their opinion. As you know, there are few people who do this.

Why should we care about unconstructive comments like “I think you shouldn’t…”? Let's be careful of those who really want to understand our approach.

I gained my self-confidence by telling myself that I was the only master of my destiny. There will always be someone better or worse than me. This is how I found what clicked.

Do you consider yourself an indecisive person?

Indecision, often driven by the fear of making the wrong choice and regretting it, is a feeling many of us experience. Anxiety tends to exacerbate this tendency.

It's important to put things in perspective and remember that not every choice we make has drastic consequences. For example, hesitating between a blue or red treat is a trivial concern. Just take the first one that comes to mind. Your life is not at stake if you choose the wrong color, and the fear associated with this kind of choice is often irrational.

You have every right to choose an option simply because you feel that way at that particular moment, and above all, to accept that choice without feeling remorse. It is always possible to choose differently next time!

For example, in a restaurant, when the menu offers many options, you can choose the least expensive or the first on the list in the category that interests you.

Personally, I used to be very indecisive about everything, but I've learned to put things in perspective. Since then I have gained a reputation as a more decisive person who doesn't like to procrastinate.

It is important to emphasize that this change does not happen overnight, but over time it becomes much less anxiety-inducing.

How do you avoid conflicts in your life?

Sometimes we avoid conflict because we perceive it as something negative and we don't want to engage in situations that could cause us emotional pain or injury.

However, there may be times when conflict becomes inevitable. For example, when someone is disrespectful to you, you can try to discuss it with that person. However, it often happens that the person only takes into account what suits them and this can lead to a conflict situation.

In response to your question, I think it is not necessary to provoke conflicts but neither should we seek to avoid them at all costs when their occurrence is inevitable. If you are a quiet person and you let someone disrespect you once it's understandable. However, if this person continues to disrespect you every time you are in their presence , then it is justified to initiate a conflict. It is important to note that the term "conflict" does not necessarily have to be associated with violence. Sometimes it's simply a matter of expressing dissatisfaction or concerns.

So, when the outbreak of conflict becomes inevitable, it is essential to remain calm and seek a constructive resolution rather than resorting to violence.

Do you live life without expectations or on the contrary, do you maintain enthusiasm in everything you do?

Expectations can be directed towards various aspects of life and interactions with others. It's challenging for us as humans not to have any expectations. It's almost unbearable to navigate life without having some degree of predictability or stability in the short and medium term.

When it comes to expectations of others, it's crucial to recognize that the vast majority of people don't owe you anything. While you may hope that they act in a certain way, you cannot compel them to do so on a personal level (although there may be more influence in professional settings).

In reality, it's difficult to completely eliminate expectations. However, you can strive to encourage others to align with your expectations by practicing reciprocity and considering their perspectives (you can't force genuine friendship, for example). Most importantly, you can learn to cope with disappointment when your expectations aren't met.

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Thank you very much for reading, it's time to invite my friends @anasuleidy, @malikusman1, @stef1 to participate in this contest.

Best Regards,
@kouba01