No Worries Mom!

in WORLD OF XPILARlast year

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“The real you is still a little child who never grew up. Sometimes that little child comes out when you are having fun or playing, when you feel happy, when you are painting, or writing poetry, or playing the piano, or expressing yourself in some way. These are the happiest moments of your life – when the real you comes out, when you don’t care about the past and you don’t worry about the future. You are childlike. But there is something that changes all that: We call them responsibilities.” - Don Miguel Ruiz

My son turned 14 the other day, so we have already gone on to far more dreadful teen-instigated mornings, but I will always remember our "earlier years" fondly. Every day is certainly different when you wake up in a home with small kids! They always manage to get out of bed with a level of eagerness and a spring in their step that would be enough to make any adult envy, let alone bewildered.

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I recall one morning way back then - whilst putting on my face, my son who was seven years old at the time, was running around in the downstairs section of our townhouse, flying two paper jets which he had made the night before. He was totally absorbed by the present moment and honestly didn’t have a care in the world, other than which of the jets was going to win each respective race. What a wonderful place to be!

I am eternally blessed and grateful to have had my own business for the entirety of Judes life and thus have not had to answer to anyone (for the most part anyway). This afforded me a lot of flexibility in my schedule – my wake up routine unfolds a little differently… I open my eyes and… “STRESS”… the end. Lol! That’s the short version, but it pretty much sums it up!

From the second I opened my eyes, I would start thinking about the day's events and the agenda which awaited me. There were so many tasks to complete, supplies to order, people to pay, advertising to see to, and so on - you catch my drift I am sure! We appear to live in a perpetual state of worry and hyperspeed anxiety as grownups in the business world, lol (and even outside of it)—it's so unnatural, not to mention completely exhausting!

I recall one particularly endearing moment back then after Jude's father had purchased a tiny "worry doll" made by a local crafter in a town up country which he happened to be visiting at the time. The idea was to tell it everything you're worried about, place it under your pillow for the night, and it will take care of everything - just like magic, all your worries would disappear!

Jude loved his stuffed animals as a kid (truth be told, he STILL sleeps with a handful of them), so every night before going to sleep, he would carefully consider which one he wanted to share his bed with. One evening, in the middle of this ritual, I asked, "What about your worry doll" My heart was truly warmed by his remark, which also let me realise how wonderful and pure childhood (and life in general) can and should be. "Mommy, I don't need a worry doll because I don't worry." he exclaimed. What could I even say to that?! There were no words fit for how precious that moment in time was!

What a wonderful mindset to exist in, right?! - Although I cannot deny that in that moment, I also did think to myself… seeing as he does not need it, perhaps I should borrow the worry doll for a little while, lol!

Yes, I am aware that we have a lot more "baggage" to carry around as adults, but wouldn't it be fantastic if we could all adopt a bit more of a "Peter Pan mentality"? You understand what I'm talking about. Unrestrained love, passion, zeal, and blind, doubt free faith. Sounds pretty blissful to me haha! In fact, if we adopted this as a habit and approached our work assignments and/or life obstacles in that same way, rather than putting them off and dreading them, who knows, we might actually like some of them and get more favourable results... Stranger things have definitely happened, haha!!!

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I once made a suggestion that people make an effort to smile at everyone they encountered throughout the day. While I try to do this most days, I do occasionally forget as I get caught up in my own plans and internal mumble jumble! However, when I do remember, it is truly surprising to watch how many people react - and also, HOW they react! Most people just stare at you as if you just landed on earth from another planet… where, wait for it, people are truly friendly to one another (goodness, how absolutely WILD and WEIRD that would be, right?! haha!) A few people generally return the favour, though. The idea that a stranger would grin at them may sound fairly "foreign" to some people, but if you study kids, they don't care if they know you or not because their decision-making is so much easier. You smile - I smile… most of the time anyway, lol.

I've said this plenty over the years, but I'll say it again. I believe that ALL of us boring adults ought to take a page out of our mini counterparts books! In so many ways, they could definitely be our teachers rather than the other way around when it comes to the things in life that truly matter at the end of the day. I reckon we all make an effort to incorporate a little bit more of a "Peter Pan" mentality into our daily lives. Why don't we at least TRY not to worry too much about the specifics, especially the ones that are out of our control. Let's try to approach our issues with a little more of that zeal and gut driven faith!!! YAY to that!

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Oh - and last but certainly not least, let us not forget to have some full spirited, AUTHENTIC fun along the way! I am prettyyyy confident that we can all make great changes in our life by adding a little more uninhibited activity and free spiritedness to it. After all, if people can heal cancer by diverting their attention to viewing comedies all day long - in turn reducing their stress and potential despair, creating a whirlpool of positive energy… then I am confident we can make more effort to add a little light to our lives!

…Spend a little extra time than normal sitting with your kids and having “ground level” chat. Explore their minds and their little world! Find out what is happening in their space. Get on their level, engage with them, and be fully present when doing so. I can assure you that not only will you leave feeling somewhat "lighter," but you will also have learned something. Perhaps you will learn how a T-Rex trying to scratch its back would be amusing, or how a giant red dragon could and would destroy all the cars in the road if it just so happened to fly by while breathing fire onto everything at that precise moment in time. The possibilities are endless actually.

And maybe, just maybe - When you declutter your life and embrace taking at least a few minutes each day to "play the role of Peter Pan" and experience childhood all over again, perhaps you will realize how precious life really is. There are so many aspects to this that go way beyond the amusement and laughter, but they are all equally helpful!

One such example which pops into my mind is living in the present moment, being completely honest, being able to forgive without hesitation, sharing without pretence and loving without boundaries - kids make this stuff effortless! My son continues to teach me such things… even in his teens!

So, how about you go jump in some puddles or roll down a grass hill!

❤❤❤

Until next time...
Much Love from Country Bumpkinland, South Africa xxx
Jaynielea

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 last year 

I can boast that I am my 8-year-old daughter's favorite toy. We spend a lot of time together with her. I think because somewhere inside I never grew up. I can well support any children's games, fantasize a lot and invent various nonsense. Unfortunately, time is relentless and soon all this will be unnecessary. In the meantime, I'm going to enjoy the moment :)

That is so WONDERFUL and yes, ABSOLUTELY enjoy it while it lasts!!! This seems to be the case less and less these days, which is really sad... genuine interaction replaced by materialism.

In part, I experienced it differently: my daughter was such a special child and always the "adult" of the two of us. She grounded me, so to speak, when I was still freaking out with the boys....

Oh, not differently at all - Jude is very similar in that respect - I refer to him as an "old soul"because he has always been wise for his years and incredibly responsible - so very often he is the one pointing things out to us adults, lol... but, this did not detract from his youthfulness if you know what I mean :)

 last year (edited)

Another piece of life advise. Thank you for sharing @jaynie..i will definitely apply this with my son.. some time i'm too busy with my own thoughts and forget about the important thing that happened to me..i don't spare much time with him.. even when i have time, i still busy with my smartphone..you can call that i'm not living in a moment..

Well, perhaps at some point you will change that. Each to their own I suppose.

The second part of that comment is a lot more genuine than the first part... Just letting you know :)

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