La amo y no está

Oh God, calm my pain, she was my life, everything good was in her, now the bad is coming to me, the darkness is leaving me without a soul, my mind thinks of you not even wanting to look at me and that hurts my chest so much. Now I cry I'm just sad to think that you weren't mine either and I didn't value you, I didn't take care of you, I didn't treat you like something special and now I'm so sorry. I look at the past and I only deserve to die, but I've returned to you oh Jehovah and my life is starting again so little by little happiness is invading my heart so miserable. I am ready to be a new person of habits more with friendly people and new people, to be clean orderly, a disciplined worker. I have no vision and I despise women because my heart was born in you and died with you, I would never dare to let another woman enter where you were, only you are my love and even if I don't see you again you will never see news that I am with another woman. I want to be a special man and loneliness has made every day make me a little stronger, without meaning to I am learning endurance, humility and hope and asking God to give it back although God can't do much if the person doesn't want to. I don't know what will happen but I have clear hopes of returning to to have her and love her so much that I would no longer receive the harm that I caused her. Because I know what I want for her and it is not so that she suffers what comes but because there is a beautiful future and a bright hope. I know you well and I know what I can make sure you live again. I don't think you'll have such a good time alone. It must be hard. I hope it's not just impossible dreams. I loved you Ruth, you are everything to me.

Oh dios calma mi dolor, ella era mi vida, todo lo bueno estaba en ella ahora me redea lo malo, la oscuridad me esta dejando sin sire, mi mente piensa en ti no queriendo ni mirarme y eso me duele tanto el pecho.ahora lloro solo de tristesa al pensar q hace tampoco eras mia y nobte valore no te cuide , no tr trate como algo especial y ahora lo siento tanto .miro el pasado y solo meresco morir , pero eh vuelto a ti oh Jehová y mi vida esta empezando otravez asi q poco a poco la felicidad va invadiendo mi corazon tan miserable.estoy listo para ser una nueva persona de hábitos mas con gente amiga y nueva gente ,ser limpio ordenado ,trabajador diciplinadi.ningun visio y desprecio a las mujeres por q mi corazon nacio en ti y murio contigo, nunca osaria dejar entrar a otra mujer donde estubiste, solo tu eres mi amor y aunque no te vea mas nunca veras noticias de q estoy con otra mujer.quero ser un hombre especial y la soledad ah hecho que cada dia me haga un poco mas fuerte ,sin querer estoy aorendiendo el aguante , la humildad y la esoeranza y pedirle a dios que ne la devuelva aunque dios mucho no puede hacer si la persona no quiere.no se que ocurrira pero tengo iluciones claras de volver a tenerla y amarla tanto q ya no recirdaria el mal q le cause.por que se lo q me quiero para ella y no es para q sufra q venga sino por que hay un futuro hermoso y una esperanza brillante.te conosco bien y se lo que Puedo hacer para que vuelvas q vivir .no creo q la estes pasabdo tan bien sola.debe ser duro . Espero q no seab solo sueños imposibles.te te amó Ruth eres todo para mi