Sunday Musings: Happiness, Emotions and How We Feel

What does it mean to "be happy?" Is happiness even a worthy thing to strive for?

Sometimes I wonder!

How ARE You, Anyway?

On a daily basis, we ask people — or they ask us — how we are. Seems like virtually everyone has been programmed to blindly respond "fine thanks, and how are you?" regardless of how they might actually be feeling.

If a loved one just died, or our cat just went missing, we might allow a "I've had better days." But that's reserved for occasions when we can draw of a very tangible and understandable reason why our day is less than perfect.

And it's rare that our having a bad day actually elicits authentic empathy.

I got to thinking about the fact that these days I mostly offer people a friendly "hello" but I less frequently ask about their well being during the initial greeting. It actually feels quite empowering, because I get to circumnavigate the whole "fakeness" of asking to someone's health.

Which isn't to say that I have grown callous and don't care... not at all!

Instead, it opens a widow to having an actual conversation at a later point — if the feeling is appropriate — during which I can more "privately" ask the question "so how are you REALLY doing?"

People tend to appreciate it, because it has a more intimate feeling of sincerity than the casual greeting.

Here's the interesting thing, though: Many people don't actually know how they are feeling!

Sad perhaps... and a reflection that we live in a world where the human spectrum of emotions seems to have grown narrower and narrower.

Most people aren't aware — let alone able to name, describe and experience — the several dozen human emotions we are capable of feeling, from rage to rapture.

I have always been a very sensitive and "feeling" individual, which was quite the challenge, growing up in an extended family of "cold hard thinkers!" Nobody really seemed to care about feelings... and there were even occasions where "having feelings" was seen as a weakness that got in the way of being "functional" in life.

But is it the sort of functional that actually makes you feel happy? Does it make you feel anything?

So... happiness.

We talk about the pursuit of happiness, but my experience is that "happiness" isn't something we can have and keep, it's something we get to enjoy during "moments" in our lives. It's like the way we might feel, the first time we kiss our beloved... it's euphoric and you might feel like your entire body and soul is awash with joy. But it's not something that stays with you, all the time!

And it shouldn't! If all you ever felt was that way, life would actually be very monotonous, and you'd have nothing to evaluate and compare that feeling to, in order to truly and deeply appreciate it!

Doesn't mean we aren't desirous of replicating... and maybe we spend our lives chasing after it.

In time, perhaps that euphoria grows into a deep and abiding sense of contentment that doesn't go away. Particularly if you have the fortune to find someone with whom that contentment never seems to fade. That's a rarity, of course... but it does happen!

Truly, though, the greatest favor we can do for ourselves — and for those around us, as well — is allow ourselves to genuinely experience our emotions... all of them, not just the "socially acceptable" ones!

Thanks for visiting, and have a great week ahead!

How about you? Are you in touch with your feelings? ALL of them? Are you aware what you're feeling, AS you're feeling it? What are your thoughts on happiness? Leave a comment if you feel so inclined — share your experiences — be part of the conversation!

(All text and images by the author, unless otherwise credited. This is ORIGINAL CONTENT, created expressly for this platform — Not posted elsewhere!)

Created at 2024.03.25 01:25 PDT
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