New Year, New thoughts?

Honestly, I didn't think I would ever write about things like 'New year thoughts'. It's been two weeks and I wasn't going to, but I was reading through steemit and found @tarazkp 's post about new year. So I decided to share some of my weird thoughts about new year and how I am going to handle things.

There's this famous meme on the internet, where the entire earth is celebrating on 31st december and far into space in a spaceship two aliens are having a conversation about that.

First one says: why are they celebrating?
Second one says: their planet made a full circle around their star.
First one says:Told you, they are not intelligent

Anyway, I am no different from other people. I don't celebrate the last or the first day but I do make plans like everybody else. Although I don't share them. So.......

I made plans last year and the entire year was really really bad for me. I am only 22.5years old and last year was the worst year of my life, till now. Who knows what I am gonna go through in the future. Even though a lots of good things happened last year but most of the time, I was paranoid and worried and kinda unhappy. All of that made me really tired and that's why I did some weird things and made some crazy choices at the beginning of this year.
I thought that I am going through shit so I should just do something that would make me happy despite the cost. And I did. I guess that did kinda made me happy and I am trying to let go of all the paranoia and anxiety.
I kind of got myself in the state of "I don't care about plans, lets just do things".

I made so many plans last year. I wanted to learn so many things and do so many things and I didn't even accomplish 10% of that. I can blame all of it on the shitty time that I went through but that wouldn't make me feel better because I could have done better and I didn't. So it's all on me.

I didn't plan on writing this post and I am almost finished with this. I decided that I am gonna do things and try new things, even if they feel uncomfortable and hard, I will give everything a genuine try. Unlike last year, I am not making huge plans, I am just taking one day at a time and not think too much. I am hoping that this will work.

The image is a 5 minute painting I made about a year ago, now using it as a thumbnail.