Contest: Tell your story#3 THE GOOD DISOBEDIENCE
Submission in marriage needs to be redefined or better still what is submission?
This story change my orientation alot about what submission is and what it is not.
After four Amazing daughters my friend and her husband, decided to stop at the 5th child, and they really wanted a male child.
They have been praying and trying but all 4 attempts were girls, which they love dearly. but there's just this thing with African men and wanting a male to carry on there name.
If you are from this part of the world you would understand this statement better.
So they decided to seek medical help and was told to stop trying for a while. The doctor told them to come back after the space of two years for proper planning with help of her ovulation calculations, so that they can have a male child.
When they came back from the hospital that day, she came straight to my house, to gist me.
I was happy for her and we both came up with a good family planning method, that can make her achieve the space she needed for the planning.
During the process of waiting she got pregnant unplanned, I knew i took pills to prevent me from getting pregnant but I couldn't explain what really happened, she was explaining to me.
Her husband got angry and eventually suggested an abortion, so they can still go ahead with their plans to have a male child.
She loves her husband so much and have always supported him no matter what. But for some reasons, she felt she shouldn't have an abortion.
She was not happy with the fact that she got pregnant and she wanted a male child too, but she refused to have an abortion.
This resulted to a quarrel between her and her husband which lasted for 3 months. During this three months, he cared little about her and her baby. He stopped talking to her because he was angry. He saw her actions as disrespect to him.
My friend would always come to me for consolation. I had no choice but to stand by my friend. The first three months was not funny, as she cried more than she smiled.
After a period of 3 months the husband realized his anger was unproductive and the wife was hell bent on having the baby. So he stopped fighting with her, and they reconciled.
The next day he suggested for them to go to the hospital for a scan, in other to know the gender and health of the baby, which my friend refused again because she doesn't want anything that will make her anxious, sad or hate her baby before birth.
This made her husband more angry, but this time not for long because he knew nothing will make his wife change her mind.
After the expiration of 9 months, it was time to deliver her baby, they went to the hospital, by the time they got to the hospital her water had broke. Not long she delivered.
When we saw she had gain little strength, me and her husband took the baby to her.
I said to her congratulations Joy it's a baby boy. My words sounded like a facade and almost made her laugh. She told me to be serious and tell her the Truth.
So I undressed the baby before her to see for her self.
It was a moment of joy for her, her husband apologized for everything but the thought of what if she had aborted the baby kept ringing in my mind, though I couldn't explain why she disobeyed her husband and kept the pregnancy but am glad I supported her.
(My friends baby boy)
The moment was priceless to me. I cried as I watched her reactions. She screamed with the last strength she had in thanksgiving to God.
(Me attending to the children who can to see her baby)
What do you think you would have done different?, would have judged her, if you where her friend?
Was she actually rebellious or stubborn, this story has thought me balance and respect in marriage.
Another thing i want to ask is as a woman do you feel the husband over reacted?
I would definitely be in the comment section to see what we all have to say and the lesson we have all learnt.
Indeed life is a teacher that never retires.
Women has this intuitive part about them, a man is the head no doubt but men should try to listen and be sensitive especially if your wife listens and supports you in everything you do.
Secondly: Women should also learn to talk things out with their husbands though you don't know why you are rebelling against his orders for the very first time you shouldn't leave him in the dark to avoid issues.. it might be hard but never forget to always carry your partner along in all and everything that happens around you.
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Thank you so very much ❣️. I would keep publishing quality content.
Thank you for participating…..
This article strongly highlights the complexities and deep emotions surrounding family dynamics and expectations. The narrative of longing for a boy child, cultural pressure and the strain it puts on their relationship is touching and relatable.
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Thank you so much for accessing my post
Thanks for standing by your friend in times of need, you have proven to be a supportive friend, a friend indeed.
Your story has taught me the importance of obeying God's principles. You know to God, Abortion is killing, taking of the life innocent unborn child. What if your friend obeyed her husband instead, she would kill a male child she was looking for all these while. Therefore obedience to God should come first in marriage, and he will change the mind of the other mate to support the one doing his will. Thanks for sharing with us.
Very true, God's word should stand above our feelings but most times our husbands are our God in human form.
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