Do you think Age Gap is a Problem in a relationship

in Steem4Nigerialast year

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Marriage and relationship are two topics that always bring about various debates, reasonings and school of thoughts. Each person has his own understanding of it especially when it is based on experience. To these set of people, it is difficult to change their perception about it.

The contest in @steem4nigeria will definitely ignite such reactions as it borders on such sensitive topic that should concern everyone.

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What do you understand by the word "AGE GAP" and when can we say there is one in a relationship?

Age gap is the difference in age between two persons. Like among siblings, you can have age gaps that might range from 1yr to 10 years depending on the spacing agreed upon by parents. Like my kids have the age gap of 1yr and 10months.

In a relationship, it is the gap difference between the man and the woman. Sometimes, the woman will be older than the man; other times the man will be other than the woman. In most relationships, there is an age gap. The age gap could be months or years. For my husband and I, we are just 4 years in age gap.

20191208_074524.jpgour 14th wedding anniversary

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Do you think Age Gap is a problem in a relationship?

This is a dicey question and would not warrant a yes or no as an answer. A relationship is built on understanding between 2 individuals, thus no much problem is expected. The relationship built on love knows no age gap depending on the people involved.

However various factors can lead to age difference becoming a problem in a relationship.

This could could be the culture of a place. When a culture of a place demands that a man should be older than a woman whether by law or inference, it can be a problem.

It could also be environmental factors, how the society looks at it. I can still remember that in the 90s, it is unheard of, for a woman to be older than the man in a relationship. It usually generates so much gossips. That is also applicable when a man who is old enough to be a girls father, marries someone of that age hahahaha! Seems funny right, when such is noticed, it sparks much gossips.

Another factor could be personal experiences on age gaps by a friend or other members of the family. This can pose a direct threat to such relationship in the future. If someone had seen a couple where the woman is older and they always have this loyalty issues, it could make one not to go for such relationship. Usually, a woman is supposed to be under the man. But if a woman is older, it will take extra humility on the part of the woman to really subject herself to the man. And the man on the other hand be over demanding, wanting to usurp the authority, wilding such authority as he would if he was to be older. If a balance is not maintained, it will really be a problem. If I for my part sees this problem, it will not be attractive to go into such a relationship.

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Does the Age gap really have a way of affecting relationships? Explain and give some examples

It certainly does. It can affect the relationship either in a positive or negative way depending on the individuals.

I once had a family friend who got married and have a 20yrs gap. The man was older than the lady by 20yrs. The lady was one of my friends then. When she told us that she was going to marry the man, tongues wagged, but I feel that her love for the man was so strong and she went ahead with the union.

The first few years of the union was full of misunderstandings. The lady loved going out, enjoying those moments we young people enjoyed, while the husband looked at it as waste of time and resources considering his experience in life.

The marital problem was so serious that the girl almost went back to the family house.

I and some friends stepped into the matter. The husband humbled himself and talked to us to beg our friend to stay put in the wedlock. We were course mates in the same higher institution with the wife.

We told him things the wife loves doing and that he should do so, even if it looked childish to him. By the time the wife advances in age like him, she will have the same understanding as he does now.

To save his marriage, he stooped low to the wife's age and did his best to make her happy. That saved the marriage. For many others, it would have ended up in divorce, infidelity and separation.

Additionally, in some lands, there is this belief that when a woman is so close to the age of the man, it becomes increasingly difficult to show submission and respect to him.

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Is there any age you are not comfortable with? If your partner has such a gap above you,

Personally, I do not like much Age gap in a relationship. A gap of 8 years and above is too much for me. I like it when we grow together and age together. It makes it easier to move along and avoid unnecessary suspicions.

Secondly, we women tend to look older faster than our male counterpart, so to curb this and still marry within our age gap bracket, we need to be resolved to do our best to remain attractive to our mate especially when the age gap is not much.

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What should be the normal age gap in a relationship?

Individuals differ and so are there views on this. Personally, I would suggest a gap between 4 years to 8 years and I love it when the man is older than the woman.

With this age gap exist, there won't be much difference in the experiences both parties have.

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Conclusion

Relationships are an important aspect of life. So care must be taken to ensure that it will be a happy and enduring one.

Great thanks to @steem4nigeria for organizing this beautiful contest and I therefore invite @goodybest @mesola and @isrealakhere to join me and say their view on this topic. Good luck to you all!

*All images are mine. The first and the last were designed by me using PicsArt app.

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This is my introductory post here

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Thanks so much for the invite Ma, and beside I agree with you that age is just a number in terms of a relationship, though so many factors sets in but at the end of the day, it comes down to the decision of those involved in that relationship. Well done ma 😊👍🏽

 last year 

That is the point. Those in the relationship have to decide what they really want. Thank you for your comment dear

You’re most welcome ma 🙏🏾😊

 last year 

Hi ma'am,

Usually, a woman is supposed to be under the man. But if a woman is older, it will take extra humility on the part of the woman to really subject herself to the man

This got my attention, I totally agree with you on this because most women will use the opportunity to treat the man any way they wish. It takes humility true true.

You and your husband still look like twins. Every year young and fresh.

Truly, with love age is just a number.

Good luck in this contest!

 last year 

I am glad that you saw reasons with me.

Thank you for the compliment. Thank you for your comment dear

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