RE: SEC17 WK:#1: Forgiveness unites family [Carrying the Torch]
Are you in my head?
I couldn’t do it, and now I was fighting the urge to cry. I don’t even know what I was potentially crying about. Maybe it was self-pity, or the expression of some kind of vague hurt. Could've been the realization of personal defeat and the feeling of powerlessness going along with it. Honestly, I didn’t know what was going on, just that… I was giving up. Whatever "this" was, it wasn’t for me, but I couldn’t even do "that" right.
That was me, just yesterday.
For the vast majority of people, life seems to be suffering. Not necessarily in the agony sense, but in terms of an underlying feeling of constant dissatisfaction. Like a buzzing mosquito in the silence of the night, or some form of emotional tinnitus you can’t seem to get rid of. It’s there and it doesn’t go away, but what does this have to do with forgiveness?
Lately, I find myself feeling this exact way, you just mentioned something that is very important, which is "forgiveness" I need to forgive myself, I need to forgive those that hurt me, even as I choose not to share my hurt with them, I just might tell another so my heart can be free once again. Thank you @wakeupkitty.pal for bringing me here, I honestly needed this closure.
To me it feels a bit like desperately clinging to the end of a rope, while dangling above a foggy chasm. You clench your teeth and start worrying about falling. You cramp up, you snarl, but eventually your fingers give out and you slip. Ironically enough, sometimes your fall is cut short and you realize the ground was just below your feet.
It's just a bad anology, but I figure some people are so strong that they manage to hold on almost indefinitely. That's probably part of that emotional background noise, partially because the act of holding on might have become indistinguishable from life itself. They don't even notice doing it anymore.
That's just how I feel anyway. Thank you for replying!
You are welcome dear! Just shout it out and know there's no need to fool yourself if it comes to forgiveness as long as you are able to build yourself a good life.
🍀❤️🤗