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It took me 3 days to finally draft my content. I was reminiscing my life on which part do I feel loved and betrayed at the same time because I cannot pin point exactly on which part of my life I am going to share to you guys. So here it goes.😅

One of the most scariest part of being in love is betrayal. Everytime we love we are risking the fact of being hurt. Even though we knew from the very start that we can get hurt but still, we are taking the risk because that is the beauty of being in love.

But what if at a young age you can experience love and betrayal? How should a young lady conquer the pain and be able to regain her self back?

LOVE HURTS BUT BETRAYAL IS THE WORST

I remembered, I was 12 years old when I first experienced my first love. I know it was not an ideal age to be in a relationship but what should I do? My heart beats rapidly everytime he is near me. I was madly in love with him.😅 At a young age I managed to be on top of my class because he was my inspiration. 7 months passed, I thought everything was at its best. Not until the day I never imagined to happen was happening, he broke up with me. He just told me "let's break up" without any explanations why or what I have done wrong. I didn't confront him after that day. 3 freaking days after I got the news that he was in a relationship with his best friend. Like seriously? Of all the people around us, why her? Damn! I trusted her that it was just merely friendship and nothing else! I felt so hurt and Everything of my life got wasted after that day.

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I began drinking alcohol and even tried smoking, cutting classes and be with different boys (no sexual thing though 😅) without realizing the impact of those things in my life.

4 years after, our path crossed again. I thought I was over him but damn, the moment I laid my eyes on him everything went back in a flash. We exchanged number again and I didn't waste any time. I wrote him a letter, "please come back to me, please love me again and I will do everything you want, leave her for me please". I went to his school and gave that letter. Since he still have classes to attend to, I told him to read it inside and be back during his break. So I waited for 3 long hours for another heartbreak. He told me, "I'm sorry but I am not in love with you anymore, I am in love with someone else, with the same person and I don't want to loose her, please let me go". Surprisingly, he was still with his best friend.

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I felt so betrayed that time. I can't accept the fact that they are still together and happy while I was so hopeless and miserable. My life was a total mess. I engaged in "boyfriend hoping" , I jumped from one boyfriend to another. All I can think was revenged. I wanted to let the boys feel the same pain that I had.

Until I got involved in my first sexual mistake. The moment he knew I lost my virginity he contacted me through the help of our mutual friend. He was like "What have you done? I didn't even touch you because I respected you. I want you to reserve it to your husband someday. Why put it into waste?".

Me: What the heck!? He didn't have the right to questioned me! This is my life!

So I continued my unhealthy activities without thinking the consequences of my actions. I was 19 years old and was about to finished my college but I needed to stop. I got pregnant.

It took me half of my life to overcome from that betrayal. It was the sight of my daughter that changes my perspective in life. Maturity came in and began regretting my actions.

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In order for me to moved forward, I wrote away my pains and left it behind. I realized that my feelings should have not drown me away. I began doing things that I loved with the people around me whom I trust and cared for me. I used their love for me as my strength to put my life back to where it supposed to be. I learned that pain hurts like hell but it is impermanent and will pass so we don't have the right to punish others by inflecting the same pain to them because they have nothing to do with it. Forgive the one's who hurt you and forgive yourself for letting them to do so.

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And above all, don't ever forget God. Even if you the whole world left you, always remember that God is with you. He didn't gave us challenges thay we could not fathom. Everything happens for a reason. And don't forget to love yourself more than anything. 😊

So, that's the end of my love and betrayal story. I am inviting @vrein @aleph.null @ariahs22 to have their entry. Thanks to @kyrie1234 and @ylene74 for inviting me to this contest.

Thank you for reading my entry guys. 😊 Spread the love everyone. ❤️

Always,

@moonlight-shadow

#contest #loveandbetrayal #sharing-steeming #steemexclusive #steemit-community #philippines