Discover Emotional Secrets and Make Your Life Better

Can you recall a time when you were annoyed with someone and made a reckless, probably hurtful remark that you later regretted? Have you ever writhed in anguish from an emotional defeat or a lost opportunity? Can you remember a time when you were consumed with emotion and withdrew from all and everyone? In all of these situations, the emotional part of your brain has created a problematic or even regrettable response to some degree.

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Researchers believe that the brain has an effective "alarm" mechanism. In an emergency, this device essentially overrides the thought portion of your brain and triggers an action or reaction that may save your life.

When the same mechanism produces irrational and unreasonable reactions in non-life-threatening circumstances in your everyday life, it causes you problems. Perhaps your loved ones notice your anger and it causes them pain or strains your relationship with them. Other effects could arise that could have been avoided if you had more control over your emotional brain.

A reactionary portion of your grey matter is under your influence. The first step is to understand why these unwelcome and apparently uncontrollable reactions occur. Half the fight is just being aware that your emotional warning system still goes off at inopportune moments. You'll be ready to take the next move if you're conscious.

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The second step is to use your willpower to create a calmer state. You'll want to use the logical or reasoning side of your brain to help you out. Your reasoning mind should not be timid, and it should be a little more assertive in exerting conscious control over your emotional reactions. With diligence and patience, you will learn to monitor the alarm response and reset the threshold to a more suitable "environment."

You'll be able to interrupt an emotional reaction and engage the more logical part of your brain until you've learned to identify emotional reactions before they happen.

When you achieve success, you will notice that you no longer ‘snap' at other people. You'll be happier because your emotional side won't be driving away with the cart of your rationality like an out-of-control team of riders.

Instead, you may discover that you are becoming calmer, more comfortable, and better able to manage situations in a way that benefits everyone and allows the good person that you are to shine through.

It may be beneficial to cultivate a more caring and kind spirit. Resetting the threshold of your emotional warning system may require being less eager to evaluate a situation and more understanding of others' perceived transgressions.

Getting rid of the thoughts of arguing or competing with others can also help you feel better. You will feel better about yourself and the world around you if you encourage things to happen naturally and let go of the urge to be in charge of every situation.

Consider putting the sage-like advice from a most unlikely source, bumper stickers, into effect. Those that say, "I perform random acts of kindness," you've probably seen. If you consciously do so, you might notice that your emotional response threshold automatically adjusts upwards.

Paying attention to your thoughts and feelings is a perfect excuse to check for inappropriate responses. However, there is one more advantage that has yet to be mentioned.

Consider the following quote from Daniel Goleman's book "Emotional Intelligence" which appears on the inside front jacket.

“Emotional Intelligence includes self-awareness and impulse control, persistence, zeal and self-motivation, empathy, and social deftness. These are the qualities that mark people who excel in real life: whose intimate relationships flourish, who are stars in the workplace. These are the hallmarks of character and self-discipline, of altruism and compassion-basic capacities needed if our society is to thrive”

Clearly, you have the ability to make significant changes in your life and the lives of those around you. The response is inside you, and it has the power to change your life.

Published on my blog: https://mileycohen.blogspot.com/