She Was Not Looking At Me

This was my first meeting with her. That day, she was sitting quietly by the sea in the soft evening sun. I was stunned when I saw her. How wonderful were the scene, the sky, and the ocean merging into each other, becoming one? I felt mesmerized looking at her.

  
The effort of her blue eyes was as if they were spread across the sea and sky. I was captivated by the magic of her blue eyes and felt myself defenseless and vulnerable, feeling a mild, intoxicating leak in my veins. I knew I wouldn't be able to move forward. I had to wait. I don't know how long I sat looking for a dry place some distance away from it.

The grey sand in front was wet. Behind, at the foot of the green hills, the dense rows of coconuts were being doubled in a strong wind, diagonally over each other, far away from the water. Fine sand particles were flying in the air all around us. It was the time of the tide, and the white mist of water pointed over the sea... like a transparent cloud. The water was rising slowly. The sad cry of the waterfowl was mixed with the noise of the waves.

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I don't know what happens in such moments. The ruckus of the ocean starts eating the leftovers somewhere inside. An unnamed sadness fills the mind. I saw her again. In the light red sun of the evening, her jasmine-like bright physique was fluttering randomly like golden flames of fire, her loose hair waving up to her waist. Seeing them reminded me of a fire in a forest – the same flash, the same glow.

Untainted from all sides, she gazed at the setting sun, with a smirk, perhaps somewhere beyond the scenes. I thought she was sitting there but she appeared to be in some other world, completely cut off from her surroundings on a lonely island away from this world. She was not looking at me, not at all.

By now, the waves had come up to her feet. Seeing her deep silence, I did not know why, for a moment, this desire arose in my mind to raise my hand and stop the waves of the sea from touching her. I didn't want to let that beautiful rainbow of sadness and silence linger on her face at that moment. I was lost looking at her. I had lost the sense of time, I didn't even notice how long I sat there watching her that evening.

In the meantime, the sun had disappeared suddenly in the chest of the ocean. While returning home, the golden wings of the birds were flickering far and wide. Their bright feathers had a deep light shade of the redish evening. I rose from my place and turned to face the reflection of ships anchored in the distant sea, trembling at the waves. The reflection of lights in them was flickering on the surface of the water like swirling lamps. But she still wasn't looking at me.

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