Movie Review: "The Expendables"

in Writing & Reviews3 years ago

Back in the 1980s-90s we had entertaining and fun action movies like Die Hard, most of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s movies. Aliens, the Lethal Weapon movies and so on. Those movies were entertaining as all-get out and made no apologies for it. In addition, the better ones took time to give us interesting characters and some good lines. Sadly that all got lost after a while and we ended up with big budget monstrosities, pieces of crap like Transformers and XXX and The Scorpion King. Utterly forgettable pap.

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Yet I was more optimistic than most when I first heard about The Expendables. I got even more optimistic when I heard that it would bring together a large selection of over the hill action stars, throw in a few newer ones for good measure and that Sylvester Stallone would be starring in it as well as co-writing the script and directing.

As far as action movies go, it’s safe to say that I wasn't let down. The Expendables isn't as deep as some of the movies I listed above and for what's basically a Dirty Dozen variation it doesn't have the same mix of drama and dark comedy that my main man Quentin Tarantino brought to Inglorious Basterds a year ago. In a way, The Expendables is a cousin to 1985's Commando. You remember that one don't you? In that movie, Arnold was a retired commando forced to go back into action when his daughter was kidnapped by goons working for a South American dictator. Arnold saved the girl, effortlessly wiped out nearly a whole army of baddies and walked off into the sunset with nary a scratch. Not cinematic art by any stretch of the imagination. But was it fun? No question!

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In The Expendables Stallone plays Barney Ross, the head of a team of free-lance mercenaries (the expendables of the title). His right hand man is Jason Statham. Statham is easily the most fully developed of all the characters. We see him both on and off the job and cheer when he whups the hell out of the tough guy who gave his girlfriend a bruise on her cheek. Dolph Lundgren plays a bad tempered dude named Gunner. Jet Li is your martial arts expert who feels his legs are too short. Terry Crews makes use of a large gun to eliminate the baddies. And Randy Couture's big problem is with his ears. We also have Mickey Rourke as the guy who owns the bar where the Expendables often congregate when not on the clock and who often helps acquire assignments for Ross and crew.

We first see Ross and crew at work taking down a group of Somali pirates. From there it's not long until they're recruited by the mysterious Mr. Church (Bruce Willis in a 3-minute cameo) to take down a Hugo Chavezesque Central American dictator. But the dictator isn't the really baddie here. No, that dishonor falls to former CIA agent Munroe (Eric Roberts) the one who's pulling the strings on the Chavez puppet.


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Stallone and Statham go down to the Central American country to get a look at what they're up against. This leads to a chase scene in which a few fruit carts get knocked down (been a while since I've seen one of those chases). At first, Stallone thinks he'll refuse the mission since the possibility of failure is likely. But a woman comes into the picture and of course we know what happens there. BANG! ZAP! POW!

Plot-wise The Expendables is more than fairly predictable and more than a little mangled. Aside from Statham and (to a lesser extent) Stallone none of the characters are fully developed, at least not to the extent that characters like Ellen Ripley and John McClane were.

Yet in this case it is possible to overlook the mindlessness of the whole thing and just enjoy the movie for what it is. The action sequences are plentiful and entertaining as all-get out. The dialogue isn't as quotable as it could've been. But there are some funny lines. The cameo appearances by Willis and Arnold are also amusing. The mix of action and humor gives The Expendables enough of a sense of fun to help it rise above the automatons of the Michael Bay variety.

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The Expendables could've been better. There could've been more depth in the story, the characters could've been more fully developed and the humor could've been sharper. But it could've also been a lot worse and the fact that it enables you to laugh at it while simultaneously enjoying the action makes it worthy of a recommendation. It's a good time at the movies and sometimes that's just what one needs.

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