Pizza is the Perfect Food

in Food2 years ago

You can say it's basic, it's played out, no real adult's favorite food is pizza. Blah, blah , BLAH! Pizza is, beyond doubt, the greatest culinary achievement humanity has ever created. Beyond the unrivaled flavor of even a plain cheese, the versatility of this masterpiece is drastically underrated, and here I plan to remedy that.

Let's start with the amazingness that is traditional pizza. You have an amazing crust (I prefer Brooklyn style), a delicious red sauce (I prefer fire roasted), and mozzarella cheese. The crust rises, getting just the right amount of crispness with the most delectable mouth feel imaginable. The cheese melts, forming these little browned circles that are just moments from burning, infusing even more flavor into this amazing delicacy. Tell me your mouth isn't watering right now, while you think about the best pizza place in your area (always go local, the chains never get it right).

Now that we've established the amazingness of the basics, let's get into the more advanced territory. Some of you will say that pizza is unhealthy, and to that I say: Only if you make it unhealthy. If done properly, you can substitute the standard flower in your crust with an alternative that will provide protein, whole grains, and a number of other nutrients. You can alter the sauce to reduce the acidity, making it more heart healthy, and also add in additional vegetables for added nutrients and flavor. From there, you have a variety of options for cheeses, from different blends to vegan selections. Basically, a properly made pizza can provide you with every vitamin, mineral, and nutrient you need from food for the day, every day, in a different style limited only by your motivation and imagination (or ability to find recipes on Google). You can use different toppings, flavor your crust with different flours and spices, your sauce with different veggies and herbs, different blends of cheeses, the possibilities are truly limitless.

If you're still with me, prepare for the most mind blowing aspect of this entire idea. We've discussed the versatility of your traditional pizza, now let's talk about the variations of pizza as a concept. You have your white pizza, buffalo pizza, BBQ pizza, and so many other common options. These are just the basics though. Going a little more advanced, you have breakfast pizza (not the stuff you had at school, although that is another basic option), which can be made with any breakfast food as a crust (waffle, toast, pancake, crepe, bagel, etc.). From there, you've got plenty of sauce options, from syrup to runny eggs or cream cheese. After that, you can use shredded hash browns, scrambled eggs/an omelet, or just cheese for your cheese. Toppings are absolutely limitless, they can be whatever tastes good to you.

Another surprise option would be the dessert pizza. Not just some oversized cookie that someone called a dessert pizza, but the real thing. Think sandwich cookie crust, ice cream sauce, shredded chocolate cheese, and candy coated chocolate toppings. Another option would be to take that oversized cookie (or a brownie) and top it with fudge sauce or peanut butter. From there, melt some marshmallows on top, sprinkle some graham cracker crumbs and choice of candy, and enjoy the deliciousness. You can also use cakes, pie crust, or a sweetened pizza crust for your base, sauce could be pudding or icing, and cheese can be anything you can melt or shave, from chocolate or marshmallow to coconut flakes. Toppings can be anything sweet, or even salty snacks like nuts and pretzels.

In conclusion, pizza is the perfect food. You can make a different variation for every meal of every day, done differently for as long as you have inspiration. You can make it as healthy as you want, regardless of any diet restrictions. If you're on a keto diet, use protein as your crust, or a veggie crust. It can be the dessert for after the meal. Pizza is everything great that food can be, and I will hear no arguments to the contrary. No more will anyone slander pizza as a favorite food, because we have proven here that pizza is better than every food. It is unrivaled, the pinnacle of culinary excellence, and I challenge you to name any other food with such range and versatility.

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I didn't even mention the simplistic options that make an acceptable bite with minimal effort. You can put sauce, cheese, and toppings on a bagel, some bread, those cans of biscuits in the fridge, or a soft taco shell and throw it in the oven at 400 until the cheese melts. They take no time to put together, little time to cook (like 10 minutes), and they'll for sure satisfy that pizza craving in a pinch. No other food even comes close to the things pizza can do.

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