What Are 'Triggers' And Why Do We Have Them?

in #health2 years ago


So we all have our blind or weak spots right? Where, without fail, we always tend to react in the same way? Well there is a reason for this and it is our subconscious minds way of protecting us, basically, that is what they literally are 'protectors'.

See what happens being born into this World is traumatic enough, thats without unconscious parenting, school, and different kinds of abuse. When there is trauma the mind of the child fractures and a protector is created to stop that child from ever experiencing that pain again. The issue is we then take these protectors into adulthood, never really healing from our childhood wounds and being constantly triggered in our relationships, and interactions with others.


To give you an example I will use myself, I don't mind admitting (mainly because I have been through the inner child work myself now) that I suffered bullying at school. The protector that was created was one of defensiveness, so growing older into adulthood I could be very defensive which then put barriers and walls up in my interactions. Not very beneficial!

And we all have them, during my sessions with clients the array of different protectors we all have is quite unbelievable! You come to realise that most of humanity is just a mish-mash of different protectors all going around triggering each other constantly. Most of us are so far removed from our authenticity and the wholeness of what was once a child which is actually quite sad.

This affects our ability to open our hearts and love authentically, develop better relationships with people, and attract the kind of people and circumstances we want into our lives because we are drawing in people and experiences from our subconscious mind, which identifies with the unhealed wounds we have. Thats why many of us continue to attract a similar kind of person into our lives over and over again because we are not getting it, we are not getting that we need to fix ourselves on a deep emotional level to draw in what we truly want.


The issue is nobody wants to do that work, of course not. Who wants to drudge up all the childhood wounds? Not many. So what happens is people remain unhealed. The irony is we see gyms packed full of people wanting to get physically fit, but nobody wants to get strong emotionally. So we then go looking for relationships hoping that the other person will 'make us happy' and then what happens is you have two people projecting their baggage at each other! It is totally unreasonable, unfair, and unrealistic to expect another person to do that. YOU have to do that first.

I honestly feel that the World is so toxic because we are toxic ourselves to some extent. As within so without, as above so below. Heal ourselves and heal the World, but who's really up for the challenge of facing the dark night of the soul?

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Tony Sayers,
Love, care, courage

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Author of the book 'Are you Living or just Existing?'

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I've found that self love and acceptance is a wonderful way to process and dismantle these triggers. When you allow yourself to feel as you actual are, without judgement, we can begin to accept where we are in our journey. From this place we can make changes more easily.

Acceptance is of course important, but its also important to face the shadows head on otherwise the triggers will always be there if that makes sense?

Unfortunately, we need to be hit --at least once to make ourselves vulnerable. Then the trigger creeps in unexpectedly. It does not want to leave because it feeds off our fear. As you say Love Authentically.

Sometimes I just say, Deal with it. It's Life.

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