Let’s name sex in… the Arab world

Sex within the Arab world is that the opposite of sport. this is often what a gynecologist in Egypt told ME. everybody talks concerning soccer however hardly anyone plays it; whereas most are having sex however no-one needs to speak concerning it.

I spent 5 years motion across the Arab region talking concerning sex, as well as Morocco, Egypt, Asian country, Qatar and Lebanon. My drawback wasn't obtaining individuals to speak concerning sex, however obtaining them to prevent. individuals were terribly desperate to raise queries and to talk brazenly concerning their experiences. i believe that was as a result of I return from a background of public health – I’m associate degree medical scientist – and conjointly I’m half-Egyptian and a Muslim, however I look Western. typically ladies don’t speak brazenly as a result of they’re terrified of being judged and that they thought, with ME returning from the West, they might speak with no judgement.

The problem within the Arab region is that the gap between look and reality. It’s not {that individuals|that folks|that individuals} aren’t doing what people do everywhere the planet. It’s that they feel reluctant to talk brazenly concerning it. Between thirty and sixty per cent of young men can say they’ve had sexual relations before wedding, however upwards of eighty per cent of young ladies say they haven’t. that begs the question: United Nations agency ar of these young men having sex with?

My biggest hope is that we are able to reclaim the spirit of our ancestors, for whom sex wasn't simply a drag however a pleasure. And it had been not simply a pleasure for men, however conjointly for girls

The reality is there’s recourse to sex workers – it’s a booming business in the Arab region. But also people don’t want to admit to sex before marriage because women are expected to be virgins on their wedding night. It’s a double standard.

Virginity is defined as a piece of anatomy, an intact hymen, so many young people are engaging in alternative forms of sex: anal sex, oral sex or ‘superficial relations’. I met a woman in Morocco who had had a one-night stand. They had superficial relations and the man had ejaculated on her legs. When she went to a doctor, she had absolutely no idea she was pregnant. The thing she kept saying to me, which was her point of pride, was: ‘I am still a virgin.’ Even though she was pregnant.

The problem is that virginity is defined in this quite superficial way. It leads young people into deeply unhealthy behaviours. An NGO in Morocco was trying to encourage HIV prevention by offering young female sex workers condoms, but they said, ‘We don’t need condoms. No way are we going to become pregnant. We only have oral or anal sex because we want to get married.’ So, in the name of an intact hymen, they were opening themselves to HIV.

Many people are under the impression that there is no HIV in the Arab world, but it is one of only two regions where HIV infections are still on the rise. Taboos around sex are a huge obstacle to rising to the challenge of the epidemic.

There is also the issue of same-sex relations in the Arab world. Of course, these are alive and well. Roughly two to three per cent of the population engages in same-sex activity. That’s on a par with global averages. But it’s a question of being able to acknowledge it to yourself, to your family, let alone the wider community.

I talk about a scenic route to democracy – it’s a long road, full of detours, emergency stops and bumps along the way. But you do see movement. In 2007, no woman would speak out about sexual harassment or being raped. Fast forward to 2014, and you find women in Egypt speaking out about their experiences.

We’ve gone through a dark period in the Arab region since the 1950s, a closing down on politics, economic thought, cultural thought. Sex is one part of that. A heap of arguments have been hijacked by Muslim conservatives. individuals became implausibly conservative, not simply Muslim however conjointly Christian and person conservatives. They wrap sex up in faith and use it as a tool of management. This creates an entire climate wherever everything is haram (forbidden), ayb (shameful).

We have an extended history as Arabs of being terribly open on sexual matters inside the context of Islam. My biggest hope is that we are able to reclaim the spirit of our ancestors, for whom sex wasn't simply a drag however conjointly a pleasure. And it was not just a pleasure for men, but also for women. If we are able to reclaim that spirit, plenty of the battle can are won. that may set U.S.A. on a decent path to handle several alternative problems within the generation to come back