Trying to Get Back Into Fitness

For awhile in college I was very into lifting/fitness and my body was in the best shape of my life. I loved the way I looked and eventually I loved to go to the gym and lift. Unfortunately what eventually happened was my lifting ended up fast tracking a genetic fault I had in my bicuspid valve which put me at risk for an aneurysm, leading to me having open heart surgery at 22. After the surgery I pretty much cut off all forms of exercise and started to gain weight because of it.

Not only do I probably look the worst I have in my life, but I know the lifestyle im living is very unhealthy and it will eventually bite me in the ass later on. The problem is while I love weight lifting, I absolutely hate cardio and my exercise now is pretty much limited to only cardio. While my surgeon and my actual cardiologist have differing opinions on the matter, I have been told by my cardiologist to not lift anything remotely heavy for the rest of my life. This is very troubling because im still only 25 and I dont want to be restricted to cardio for the rest of my adult life.

I also have been starting to get nervous when I try to lift because now I am scared that if I lift something will burst and ill die. As hard as I try I just cant get into cardio so I am still trying to stick with lifting at least small weights and doing more repetitions, which some people say is less strain on the heart. In my backyard there is literally a highschool track right next to it, so I wish more than anyone that I could learn to love cardio, but thats not the case and I want the more muscular body I used to have.

I think im just going to have to dive in and try and push through my fears of lifting again and try to get back in shape. I need to get the weight off and I want to work towards getting the body I once had. I have noticed myself becoming more and more upset with the way I look in recent months and I need to do something about it. I dont think ill be able to lift like I used to , but any form of exercise with weights is better than nothing. In the mean time I am going to hope I hit the lottery so I can afford a home with an indoor pool, which is the only type of cardio I enjoy.

I thought when I had the surgery it was going to be the hardest part, but now I feel like I am stuck in this middle area where I cant progress without putting my heath at risk. Someone said whats the point of having the surgery if you cant do what you want to for the rest of your life, the point was so I could live my life and I sort of agree with them. Its a bit risky maybe, but I also think my main doctor is being a bit too much by the book. My surgeon who has done the surgery for thousands of patients said that worst case scenario is I would need to have another surgery and by that time they could do it much easier. I hope that I wont need another surgery for years and also that at the same time I can build up my body to a fraction of what it used to be.

-Calaber24p