New England, USA - an outsider's impression

Almost five years ago, I moved to the New England region of the United States. I grew up farther south, around Washington, D.C., and I had never so much as set foot in New England before moving there. I certainly didn't know much about the culture or the region. To be honest, I don't think I could have named all the states that made up New England. I guess I just assumed it was a place full of people who commuted to New York or lived in Boston.

For the record, New England is made up of six states: Connecticut, Massachusetts, Rhode Island, Vermont, New Hampshire, and Maine. There is nothing formal about the term "New England" - it's just a nickname for a region, like how someone might say "the South" or "the Midwest" or even "the Caribbean."

About 15 million people live in the region, which makes it less than 5% of the population of the United States as a whole. Most of New England is actually pretty sparsely populated, which was a misconception I had before moving here. I figured the whole region would be a crowded mess of a suburb, but once you get about an hour away from New York City, the land gives way to the countryside and the population density really drops. If you were to drive from one corner of New England to the other, Google Maps says it would take you almost 10 hours. The entire northern border of New England sits against Canada (mostly Quebec and New Brunswick). I took this picture just over the Vermont border coming from Massachusetts - it is not a terrible representation of what 90% of the region looks like.

Culturally, this is the land of the New England Patriots (duh) and the Boston Red Sox. About halfway through Connecticut is where the Yankee fans give way to the Red Sox fans. They are die hard sports fans up here, much more so than around D.C. Seafood is pretty popular here, mostly lobster and clams. There are plenty of pizza places, more so than elsewhere. They call sub sandwiches "grinders". The politics of the region lean heavily towards the liberal side of the spectrum, especially so in Connecticut, Massachusetts, Rhode Island, and Vermont. New Hampshire and Maine are both a little more independent minded, but it's mostly reflected in the state and local level. All six states in the region went for the Democrat candidate for president every election since 2004 (including the one with Trump, although a part of Maine did go red).

Lots of people have what to an outsider sounds like a Boston accent (though there are differences between the states/towns). Cape Cod is the quintessential summer vacation destination. Boston is the cultural hub of the region, as well as by far the biggest and most influential city. But by far the single greatest difference between here and the rest of the country is just how insular this region is.

This is a very socially inaccessible place, and it is ingrained into the culture here. Not only have most families that you will meet lived in the region for hundreds of years, but the concept of your "town" is stronger here than anywhere I've ever seen. Where I grew up, your town was what you wrote when you had to give your address and nothing more. If you lived in a decent sized city, you might have a city hall and a mayor and even a police force, but for most people, the lowest level of government was the county. I went to county schools, got pulled over by county cops, and even shadowed a county employee in high school for a leadership program. In New England it is reversed - the county is the arbitrary line on a map, and the town drives just about everything.

Not only does this lead to some ridiculously small police forces and fire departments, this town-centric mentality reinforces the already closed-off mindset of the people who live here. When so much of you identity is bound up in the town you live it, it's no wonder that this region is so unwelcoming to outsiders. Even if you've lived here all your life and your family had owned a house there for 100 years, if you move one town over you are still seen as an outsider. It is truly bizarre.

Most people I've met here are generally unwilling to initiate any kind of social interaction, which is very different to other parts of the country where you might even have the opposite problem (looking at you, South Carolina). When you do start talking to someone, it usually feels like they are waiting for you to finish up so they can get back to whatever it was they were doing before you interrupted them. It is very difficult to really get to know people here, because I feel like people here are so set in their ways and their existing social circle and just don't even consider the fact that they are excluding outsiders. I have spoken with many other transplants to the area and they all agree - New Englanders can be downright rude at times.

That said, there are still plenty of great people here, as in most anywhere you go. I am just speaking in stereotypes. But it is a lonely part of the country to move to if you're used to the genuine friendliness of the South or the at least fake friendliness of California. I have had at least a few locals react to learning that I moved here with surprise - as in "wow, why would anyone move to New England?" They say it in a self-deprecating sort of way, like they think there is nothing that would attract someone to the region, but you get the feeling down deep inside that they secretly wish you hadn't shown up.

Bottom line: while I live in New England, I can't ever see myself calling it home. It is downright beautiful here, but the people are as cold as the winters.

Thanks to @janton for the inspiration to write this!