Hazlerigg goes it alone
Hazlerigg, on the northern edge of Newcastle, decided to leave the EU without a deal anyway, despite Johnson ditching his ditch plan.
The Parish Authorities released the following memo on the matter:
"Hazlerigg Village would like to convey a big fuck you to Johnson, the EU, Westminster, Newcastle City Council any other institution attempting to impose rule from outside the village... (W)e 'll sort things out from now on, we're fine on our own thank you."
As predicted, problems quickly ensued at the shop: "we are having problems with our suppliers" a staff member told one aghast would-be-customer in response to their query regarding the absence of bacon from the shelves.
"When they said we were 'leaving the world's biggest trading block' i didnt think they meant 'nee more bacon in the shop'. The shop always used to have bacon" the forlorn aspiring customer said.