Funny Jokes

in #funny7 years ago
  1. did you know that graveyards are the most popular places in the world? It's because people are just dying to get in.

2.What is the loudest pet in the world? Trumpet.

3.What does a buffalo say to his son when his son leaves for collage? Bison.

4.If you ever have a stroke, just remember that you are all right.

5.My granpa has the heart of a lion, and a lifetime ban from the zoo.

6.Where do you find a turtle with no legs? Right where you left him.

7.Why do crabs never share? Because they are shell-fish.

8.What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? You can tune a guitar but you can't tune-a fish.

9.What do you call a fish with no "i"s? a fsh. (this joke works better if you're telling it to someone. if you do say it like eyes)

10.What happens when you have a bladder infection? Urine trouble.

11.What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

12.Do you know why i hate stairs? It's because they are always up to something.

13.What time did the patient go to the dentist? Tooth hurty.

14.If a dog's tail falls of where can he go to get a new one? The retail store.

15.Why can't dinosaurs clap? It's because they're dead.

16.What's blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.

17.How do you make a kleenex dance? You put a little boogie in it.

18.Why can't you hear a pterodactyl when it goes to the bathroom? Because the "p" is silent.

that is all of them, I hope you liked it :)

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