HEARTBREAK HOTEL
I was at the grocery checking out when the manger noticed my bright Dashiki. He called to me from the center island. "I like that Dashiki, where did you get it it?" "I got it from the Hotline" , I answered. he asked what was the Hotline. I told him it was a thrift store to benefit the battered women's shelter. I hollered across the room, "I shop there a lot because I want my wife to have a nice place to stay if she doesn't start doing the dishes!" His eyes got big as his face looked worried. I glanced behind me and there were about 8 - 10 women standing in line to check out. No sir, I don't believe a one of them had a sense of humor. In fact I could feel the daggers hitting me in the back. Fortunately there was a young fellow standing directly behind me, the only other man in line. He was desperately trying not to laugh. I looked back at the line of women, "It was a joke!" I explained. No one smiled except the poor fellow behind me. I looked at him and said, "I thought it was funny." as I shrugged my shoulders. I could read the man's mind and his thoughts were the same as mine. Get your groceries and RUN! "Hold 'em off as long as you can" I said under my breath. He was struggling not to explode into laughter and the rest of the line was about to explode period. Of course to top it off I was in the 12 item express lane with 14 items. Every woman in line was counting the "blips" from the scanner. I tried to make a quick getaway, but the cart had the one bad wheel that wobbled and squeaked. I jumped in my wife's car with the pink eyelashes and sped away. I'll not be shopping in that grocery for a while and I might have to bury that Dashiki.
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