Letter to your beloved

in #funny7 years ago

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Honey Lily,

I received your letter - I'm very happy that you feel good and that your nerve treatment in the sanatorium goes well. Well, the money was a little big for 4 weeks lying down and doctoring with doctors, but that's what I'm going to do when I come to meet you at the station. But we'll have to walk home because something was bothering you and I drew all the money from the bank, then I put them in a jar and buried it in the basement, and now it's flooded I can get to the jar for the tram or taxi we do not have ...

Otherwise, I'm fine. I am surprised by myself how I can cook better. There is no need for me to pump my stomach in the hospital, as it was in the first two days. I like to make french fries, but they do not go to the restaurant - I think I'll have to swallow them the other time. Abe, why cook the eggs 2-3 hours and still do not soften. You may buy specials from somewhere. Ah, when I mentioned eggs, let me tell you, this Teflon pan does not work. I put frying eggs and no eggs and went for a beer to the corner - well, I was a little bit nervous that I met Vanka and we drank one, but I did not have 40-50 minutes at most. When I came back everything was melted and became a teflon pancake, but something is not delicious. Otherwise, the firefighters were quite polite ... As the smoke was removed, it was obvious that there were no major defeats, only the cat was no longer white - and now, as I felt that I was going to the kitchen, it started to run, gully and fled. A few days ago I wanted to warm a can in the microwave oven (25 minutes at 1000 watts), but the cannon exploded, but it just erupted, passed like a rocket through the microwave ceiling, then through the kitchen ceiling and - bass joke - hit the neighbor Popangelov exactly, but exactly the guys / luck just at that time and he cooked the lunch above, and on the bottom panties, please, that he was very warm /. And the microwave door, pulling out of the hinges, broke the small TV where you bought him to watch the show while cooking. Hey, this shock wave is not a joke.
Did it happen to you that you had the dishes to catch a mold. How is this possible in just three weeks. The sink can safely test processes of the biological development of at least three types of bugs. But do not worry - I'm a volunteer, and I've had a lot of hard work to wash the dishes. However, your grandmother's porcelain porcelain service does not cost anything - it can not withstand 800 centrifugation in the washing machine. I decided to save electricity and water, and along with the porcelain / already in pieces, but with a lot of luck and glue from them will come out 1-2 cups / I put my sneakers, screwdrivers and steak steak. However, apparently one of the smaller screwdrivers passed through the holes in the drum and when it was centered on the centering, remember when I switched on the back of the highway, something like this happened now, and it was quite dangerous, pouring out of the drum before it stuck in the wall for a while to decapitate me. The drum beat down the kitchen wall and is now in the yard, and the washing machine was running for another hour and a half of water because I did not know where the main water tap was, which explains the flood in the basement.

I put a little on the Persian carpet in the living room in one place with ketchup, silver lacquer for cars and putty / for the combination do not ask / but it is not true that it does not leave. With gasoline, everything goes out, but I do not have to smoke while handling the stain - now there is a burned hole.

Ah, I decided to thaw the refrigerator and clear the ice in the chamber. So with a spatula, a chisel and a hammer can wonders. Korava's ice did not stay. Well, the refrigerator is not cold now, but only warm, but we will always have a warm meal.

Yesterday, when I got home, I saw a thief come in. I'm very angry at the old radio that was in the bathroom and playing while I was shaving, but I'm going to experience it. Other my works are not missing. But another time telling you to take your bag with the papers and the bank cards that you may need (nothing to go to a sanatorium) - to listen to me. You will now have to deal with the police, the banks, the stupid bureaucrats, and the courts. As if the devil made me put the notarial acts of the villa and the apartment in the same bag, I do not know. We were hiding them in the refrigerator in that envelope, and as you already know, the refrigerator thawed it and your bag was the closest to stuffing the documents ... Wardrobes are almost empty, but it's not a big waste for you - that there is nothing to put on.

Oh, let me tell you, do not you ...? Better now, in writing, that after you come, I do not get any more mood. So your mother kicked the bell. Get hit. And why, please. Did you know she had a love affair with Popangelov's neighbor above? And when he came to pick up the laundry and I said about the washing machine, and if he did not wash, I would come along in linen to welcome you to the train station, and when he realized that he would never again - as a result of the blow to the canvas - she could pick up the job and get sick and 10 minutes later she was gone between the living. I was thinking of calling for a quick help, but they were still writing in the newspapers that they were getting too ... for 10 minutes and they would not have succeeded. The funeral was yesterday, but I could not go because something was irritating my head, but I was gone, do not worry. When you come back, we can dig her up and cremate her as she wants. And we'll put the ashes in a sandwich to make some useful work. Wait for the door to ring ...
I have to conclude that some type of mutter waved a deed of the dwelling, that it was his day and that I had not been hit. I'll go to sleep at Vankata, he even invited me to buy a new 70-inch TV - we'll watch the game.

Bye and with love
Your George Mouse

Picture source : pixabay

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This post has received gratitude of 0.75 % from @appreciator thanks to: @funky-monkey.

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