rather than just an "scraped" chapter, it could be combined with others in some way, the plot per se may not have advanced, but it was developments of a relationship between main characters, and that is always worthy of appearing... now, one thing I've been feeling with the last few chapters, is that the flow of time is weird, or better said, I don't feel a proper succession of days in there, I wouldn't have guessed that a week has passed if you adn't told.
Oh, I agree that it's necessary information. Just not so much by itself, standalone, as it is here.
With the days - if we just start at the start of the week, let's say she arrived on Monday morning, Monday night she fell into the hole, Tuesday afternoon she fell out of the waterfall, then she passed out for three days, awakening on Saturday sometime. She went hunting that evening, though that got cut short by Serenithyl. And we're up to Sunday now.
I agree that it's a bit sketchy though. But at the same time, I'm writing each chapter on the fly each day, off the top of my head, with no real plotting and planning, and figure I can tie it in better and make it more cohesive later if I really want to push this out as a proper work and not just a random steemit thing. :)
The soggy middle -- I love your observations on that - you nail it! And I love Draven, of course. He reminds me in a good way of my own protag, Herr Doktor. ;) . Your Day 8 btw was NOT too full of dialogue ("small talk" prompt). You're doing great! And I like your opening comments as much as I like/love/LOVE your prose!
I get a bit iffy with dialogue sometimes. It could be my own fear of "rabbiting on too much". So much of my writing is written in the mind of my characters, that when talking starts my worrying starts too. Is it too much? Too little? Do they all the sound the same? It reads like I'm talking to myself.
Herr Doktor has a bit more personality than Draven does. Something I aim to fix if I polish this up! :D
But, ugggghhh ~ the middle ~ it's Day 16 at the time of this comment, which means... we're still stuck in the middle. I'm not sure how much longer I can cope! ;)
Ohhh, Draven has character!! He reminds me in a good way of my favorite actor, the young Clint Eastwood in The Good , The Bad, and The Ugly, you know, the strong silent type... Draven has restraint but a latent desire for mischief, and a dad watching over him, maybe inhibiting him, but not succeeding, because Draven has his way with the "alien" woman from another place and time. Taboo breaker! A chip off the ol' block! Never mind omens and history lessons; boy meets girl and all the rules and logic just kind of implode, however hard Draven may try to toe the line and rein in his impulses. Lack of character! Go watch some Clint Eastwood, honey! And as for rabbiting on (great phrase) - tell Stanger to knock it off. And here again, BEFORE I read this from you, I was asking myself why I let Stangler go on like he does, and Lady Graves just told him he should be a professor and lecture to a captive audience. I tell ya, we are on a wavelength...
This chick needs to get something to eat, or she's gonna pass out when he makes love to her. #NovMadFan Bruni putting his own spin on your nano. 🤭
rather than just an "scraped" chapter, it could be combined with others in some way, the plot per se may not have advanced, but it was developments of a relationship between main characters, and that is always worthy of appearing... now, one thing I've been feeling with the last few chapters, is that the flow of time is weird, or better said, I don't feel a proper succession of days in there, I wouldn't have guessed that a week has passed if you adn't told.
Oh, I agree that it's necessary information. Just not so much by itself, standalone, as it is here.
With the days - if we just start at the start of the week, let's say she arrived on Monday morning, Monday night she fell into the hole, Tuesday afternoon she fell out of the waterfall, then she passed out for three days, awakening on Saturday sometime. She went hunting that evening, though that got cut short by Serenithyl. And we're up to Sunday now.
I agree that it's a bit sketchy though. But at the same time, I'm writing each chapter on the fly each day, off the top of my head, with no real plotting and planning, and figure I can tie it in better and make it more cohesive later if I really want to push this out as a proper work and not just a random steemit thing. :)
The soggy middle -- I love your observations on that - you nail it! And I love Draven, of course. He reminds me in a good way of my own protag, Herr Doktor. ;) . Your Day 8 btw was NOT too full of dialogue ("small talk" prompt). You're doing great! And I like your opening comments as much as I like/love/LOVE your prose!
I get a bit iffy with dialogue sometimes. It could be my own fear of "rabbiting on too much". So much of my writing is written in the mind of my characters, that when talking starts my worrying starts too. Is it too much? Too little? Do they all the sound the same? It reads like I'm talking to myself.
Herr Doktor has a bit more personality than Draven does. Something I aim to fix if I polish this up! :D
But, ugggghhh ~ the middle ~ it's Day 16 at the time of this comment, which means... we're still stuck in the middle. I'm not sure how much longer I can cope! ;)
Ohhh, Draven has character!! He reminds me in a good way of my favorite actor, the young Clint Eastwood in The Good , The Bad, and The Ugly, you know, the strong silent type... Draven has restraint but a latent desire for mischief, and a dad watching over him, maybe inhibiting him, but not succeeding, because Draven has his way with the "alien" woman from another place and time. Taboo breaker! A chip off the ol' block! Never mind omens and history lessons; boy meets girl and all the rules and logic just kind of implode, however hard Draven may try to toe the line and rein in his impulses. Lack of character! Go watch some Clint Eastwood, honey! And as for rabbiting on (great phrase) - tell Stanger to knock it off. And here again, BEFORE I read this from you, I was asking myself why I let Stangler go on like he does, and Lady Graves just told him he should be a professor and lecture to a captive audience. I tell ya, we are on a wavelength...