Leyla (Freewrite #124)
Huge thanks to @mariannewest who is hosting this great #freewrite contest! Also I'd like to thank @poetrybyjeremy for telling me about this and encouraging me to participate! It's only been three days for me, but it's just awesome, so thanks to anyone participating and making it awesome!
Leyla
How was this saying going? A snake in the hand is worth two in a bush? Leyla frowned. No, that didn't sound right. She should have paid more attention during class today. And yesterday. And maybe the day before. But how could she? There was Michael, this new fella in her class. The moment he had entered, the eyes of almost everybody followed him from the door to the teacher's desk and finally to his chair. Not just the girls. He was such a cutie. Well, Leyla thought so, but after school the other day, she had overheard Therese and Iris talking about Michael, and how weird his face would look. That he didn't seem normal. Leyla shook her head, although she was pretty sure nobody could see her. What did they know? Therese and Iris had been to Portugal last year, then to France and finally they had gone skiing in the Alps during holiday season around Christmas. Their parents were loaded, and the two girls were interested in only one thing: money. Leyla didn't like them. But she had overheard Thomas, too, who had approached the teacher after class, and had asked her if he really had to sit right next to Michael. Leyla didn't know what to make of all this. She heard the bus coming, grabbed Carries leash, and Carrie would, as always, lead Leyla every step of her way.
Love how you started the freewrite - great direction to take the prompt. Moreover, that was a great write - how you first described Michael in such positive terms, then we get to see that not everything thinks alike. Actually, everything perceives things differently. I like that!
Thank you so much! I really love freewrite and I'm so glad you "persuaded" me! :)
You've brought us into Leyla's world rather aptly. Am I to assume she is vision-impaired ... great way to show and no tell.
Thank you! I didn't know this when I started writing, but yes, after two or three lines I imagined her as blind or vision impaired ... though I didn't want to be too blunt, I like to be more vague so that hopefully many people can take just "their" piece out of it. I'm not sure what led me into this direction, but I've worked with blind and vision impaired people a while ago, I guess that had (maybe only in the back of my mind) a certain impact.
It does open up some interesting plot progression.
This is so heart felt, great job 👍 I’m really enjoying your stories.
Thank you so much, I'm so glad you like my stories! To be honest, I had thought about skipping freewrite today, the day was kind of exhausting (it's about 10.30 p.m. here) and I felt I couldn't create anything (except for something to eat ;)). But freewrite is such an amazing concept, I figured I'd give it a try because it would only take 5 minutes and if didn't like it, I still could keep it to myself. It's really a great experience for me, I've learnt so much. Until now I've never believed in "forcing" myself to write for just a few minutes every day, I just thought that wouldn't work for me though I never even tried - how stupid of me!
I believe you have found your niche 😊
Im new here 3 days in and loving it too!
I love how you took the snake theme and turned into something completly new
Thank you so much - and also welcome to freewrite ;) It's really a great community and creating even such short stories is so much fun!
That was so clever how you let us to the end... so many different ways to 'see" someone.
Today's prompt: https://steemit.com/freewrite/@mariannewest/day-125-5-minute-freewrite-wednesday-prompt-cinnamon
Thank you so much! There's indeed a lot to learn, I guess for everybody, when it comes to "seeing".