Day 698: 5 Minute Freewrite: Wednesday - Prompt: a bunch of excuses

For @mariannewest in #freewrite

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I remember this joke.

Late at night, the wife, wanting a cigarette, sent her husband to get it. Unfortunately, all the stores were closed (this wasn't in the United States) and the man went to a local bar, hoping to get the cigarette there.

He ordered a drink and started to talk to a nice looking girl that happened to be in the bar. They had a good conversation and he offered to walk her to her place. She offered to have a coffee he and he agreed. Upstairs they hit it off, had sex and fell asleep.

In the morning, when he woke up and remembered everything he was frantic.

"Do you have a piece of chalk?" he asked the girl

"Yes, but why?"

"Never mind, just give it to me."

When the girl gave him the chalk he put it all over his hands and went home.

Having arrived home he met the screaming wife

"I just sent you for a cigarette and you disappeared for the entire night? What happened!?"

"Ok, sweetheart, I will tell you everything... The stores were closed and I stopped by the bar. In the bar, I meet a nice girl. We talked and then I went to take her home. She invited me for coffee. We went upstairs and had sex. Then I fell asleep."

The wife looked at him inquisitively

"Really? Show me your hands!"

When the husband showed her his hands she screamed

"Bastard! Don't give me any excuses! I could see what has happened on your hands! You played pool with your friends all night!"