I woke up to the bright lights shining through the curtains in my bedroom. Slowly, I opened my heavy eyes to welcome the morning sun. It's 6.30am already and it is time to wake up to fight another day. It's been like this for as long as I can remember. Perhaps too long and it's starting to burn me up inside out.

One day felt like one week; one week felt like one month. Never have I ever thought that the days would be so long. Before this, time never seem to be enough but here, it seemed to go on forever. Sitting up on my bed, so many things come to mind. I was anxious of what would bring forward to me today. Somehow, deep inside, I was sure that whatever was planned out for the day, it would never pass.

I had the instinct that somehow everything would go awry; actually in this place, maybe one doesn't need one. Be it a man or women, one would be able to predict that everything would go wrong. Nothing is ever as planned.

NOTHING !!

The only thing that I could control was my actions and emotions. However, I knew my control wasn't very strong lately. I was getting agitated and frustrated easily the past few days, even at the slightest distraction. Oh yes ! I so needed a distraction so that my mind could get away from this reality.

Source

I'm hoping to see her again. She has always been a good distraction; even if it was just for a few short moments. Unfortunately, fate is never on our side. Perhaps that's how it's played on us. This current life is not ours to have. We are so apart and yet in someway we're more together than ever.

Is this part of the whole Man and Venus trick on us? To be so close to each other and yet still be apart. Perhaps the next life would be different. No one would ever know.

I got out of the bed and headed to the bathroom to freshen up. I can only pray that whatever lays ahead of me, I have the strength to overcome it as I have always.