Orange Blossom -5minutefreewrite, also Comedy Open Mic Round 33
Smell the air. I haven't a clue what an orange blossom smells like. I know what oranges smell like. But... I don't think I've ever noted the smell of an orange blossom. Surely I've had the opportunity. I live in Los Angeles, and there are orange trees in the neighborhood... but I don't realize their orange trees (and not some other citrus tree) until I see the oranges on them. There's one tree that I know is a kumquat tree even when there aren't kumquats on it... But still, I never notice the blossoms. What do orange blossoms look like?
Ha. Imagine a meme of Blossom (you know, the tv show's titular character) but she's orange.
Or, oh. Well this is sad. What if she's blossom, but orange like everybody was saying trump is, so it's, like, a trump reference. ENH.
Or, better, what if it's an orange that looks like Blossom. Kind of like I found a tomatillo that looked like .... a large nosed person. I dunno anyone in particular, but it definitely looked like a nose. I'll go find the picture as soon as I'm done writing here. Oh... That's it for my freewrite, but let's make this a COM post. I nominate @stinawog and @mariannewest to make funny posts for #comedyopenmic
Next part of the entry is my poem for @papa-pepper's contest here: https://steemit.com/contest/@papa-pepper/papa-pepper-s-wild-and-strange-contest-season-17-round-4-poetry
Steem steem steem steem
Steem steem steem steem
Got your attention, I'm a ripped frog
Yeah, from the cereal by Kellogg
Not a toad
Shoulda knowed
They wear board shorts
And play team sports
nah
Won't hear me moan
This is me
A thong and alone
I'm slimy from your attention
Won't keep you in suspension
The truth as you know it
I control it
Steem steem steem steem
Steem steem steem steem
You try to boil us to keep us from jumping
I see you weak holders fearfully dumping
You ain't invested
Barely interested
But you'll be empty-handed
When we've finally landed
Moon moon moon soon
Steem steem steem steem
Steem steem steem steem
Moon moon moon soon
Landed on the
Moon moon moon soon
Steem steem steem steem
Steem steem steem steem
Steem steem steem
On... the moon
Now who's feeling incepted, are you?
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Hi improv,
Thank you for your entry in to #comedyopenmic comedy contest. We have asked the judges below to review your entry and give it a funny rating. (They generally have no sense of humor, as the saying goes, those that can't do, start contests and judge).
This will determine your ultimate position when the results are tallied. (That being said, you are free to adopt any position you wish - we can recommend pantsless with beer in hand.)
Judges:
If you have any questions or queries please feel free to contact one of the judges or come say hi in discord: Click Here
Thank you to @matytan for the great banner
Hey, @improv.
I lived in Orange County for four years, and I don't remember ever smelling orange blossoms there, either. Not even sure if there were any orange trees, let alone groves. We even lived in the City of Orange for about a year or so.
From reading answers about what they smell like from questions made online, it sounds like it's all over the board. Honeysuckle, gardenia, sweet, citrusy, creamy, floral, with orange mixed in. Some people described it as heavenly.
So, there you go. I say, pick your favorite smell and imagine it. :)
Okay, so the poem is hilarious, very much should win, and, I think you should include a dsound or dtube version of you singing it in your finest hip hop style. :)
Someone else just commented on this post that they smell heavenly. WHY DON'T THEY SMELL HEAVENLY HERE? What does Heaven smell like !?!?
Well, it's LA, for one thing. Too much smog to smell much of anything else unless you're up close, right? My guess is, there aren't any orange trees in the city. :)
However, I do have a lead for you on an orange grove. Supposedly CSU Northridge has on their campus the last remaining orange grove in the San Fernando Valley. And the orangea are free to pick if you like. I guess you can just walk through the grove gate and get them.
The idea, then, would be to get there when the trees are blossoming. Don't know how often that happens, but I would guess spring would be your best bet.
As for heaven, I would imagine it smells better than anything earthly. :) Just a hunch.
I read that as "heaven smells like butter"
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Why do I feel like you had some acid in you before you composed this
Orange blossoms, brother.
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This post truly got my attention when my name on discord popped.
WHATEVER IT TAKES
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Hahahaha, titular. Tit-ular. Hahahaha
Yep, that's the reaction I was hoping for!
#thebird
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I lived in Florida. The orange blossom there smell heavenly. Maybe it is thos califorinicated ones that don't smell
moon moon moon soon
soon soon moon
Fingers crossed-eyed
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This post has received a 3.13 % upvote from @drotto thanks to: @sbi-booster.
First a funny freewrite. And then a rap? Are you a rapper? Lol
I'm not, but @papa-pepper is!
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I'm not, but @papa-pepper is!
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