Local Derby -5minutefreewrite

For https://steemit.com/freewrite/@mariannewest/day-462-5-minute-freewrite-friday-prompt-local-derby

This hat is the closest hat to my body. To my self. So it is my local derby.

BRAAAYYY. That's the sound I make when I laugh at my own intentional misunderstanding. So I'm a donkey laugher. BRAAAAYYY.

The problem with all local derbies, you know, is that they're only made up of locals. There's no exciting twist to them. And that's what I like about any kind of competition, an exciting twist. Like, is that little woman faster than that very tall man, TWIST, actually that person who was wearing a peacock hat is the fastest of all! You'd never have guessed it from her outfit. But no, at our local derbies, I know who will win, because Svetlana is faster than everyone else by a considerable amount. She's so fast that when Charles, whose real name is Chuck, but he prefers that people call him Charles, as if his folks were fancy folks, ... I forgot where that sentence was going. I suppose the truth is, by the time someone can finish telling about Charles' little silliness, Svetlana has already won the race.