Ancient Words Of Love // Freedom Friday No. 9 “Freedom Of Love”

My bounty is as boundless as the sea,
My love as deep; the more I give to thee, The more I have, for both are infinite.
~ William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet

Love

This week on #FreedomFriday we are discussing Freedom Of Love, and is a fine companion to last week’s theme Freedom Of Sexuality. Love is a very complicated emotion while maturing. When we are young our hormones, emotions, and sexuality are developing so the word love can be used carelessly.

As a female born during a free love generation and a child of a hippie (yes a true San Franciscan daisy wreath wearing and jewelery making mother), and a Dad who was an artist I learned of love fairly early on. I was their love child, and as a child I had no idea what that meant, but with maturity I found it held a very special sweetness.

Some of us have the fortune to learn about love at a young age but many do not. Defining words and feelings is not always an easy task, but through life experience we learn that love is everything.

As a reader of many types of literature the bible holds one of my favorite descriptions of love, the scripture is take from 1 Corinthians 13: 4-13 and reads:

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it his not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away.

When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.

So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

Primarily the above scripture gives a basic definition of what love means and even though one may not agree or follow this book, the meaning is very powerful. Love can and will overcome anything, that is the power of love and we all hold this power within us as a human and spirit creation.

Defining Love

After learning what love basically means when we dig a bit deeper into the ancient Greek transliteration of the word love we learn there are actually six different types of love. So let us ponder the power of this small four letter word, with some great pointers from Yes magazine:

Eros, or sexual passion

The first kind of love was eros, named after the Greek god of fertility, and it represented the idea of sexual passion and desire. But the Greeks didn’t always think of it as something positive. In fact, eros was viewed as a dangerous, fiery, and irrational form of love that could take hold of you and possess you—an attitude shared by many later spiritual thinkers, such as writer C. S. Lewis. Eros involved a loss of control that frightened the Greeks. Today, losing control is precisely what many people now seek in a relationship.

Philia, or deep friendship

The second variety of love is philia or friendship, which the Greeks valued far more than the base sexuality of eros. Philia concerns the deep friendship that develops between brothers in arms who had fought side by side on the battlefield. It is about showing loyalty to friends, sacrificing for them, as well as sharing emotions with them. We can all ask ourselves how much of this comradely philia we have in our lives.

Ludus, or playful love

While philia could be a matter of great seriousness, there is a third type of love valued by the ancient Greeks, which is playful love. Following the Roman poet Ovid, scholars (such as the philosopher A. C. Grayling) commonly use the Latin word ludus to describe this form of love, which concerns the playful affection between children or casual lovers. We’ve all had a taste of it in the flirting and teasing in the early stages of a relationship. But we also live out our ludus when we sit around in a bar bantering and laughing with friends, or when we go out dancing.

Agape, or love for everyone

The fourth love, is agape or selfless love. This is a love that we extend to all people, whether family members or distant strangers. Agape is translated into Latin as caritas, which is the origin of our word "charity.” C.S. Lewis referred to it as “gift love,” the highest form of love. This tyle of love also appears as the idea of mettā or “universal loving kindness” in Theravāda Buddhism.

Pragma, or longstanding love

The use of the ancient Greek root pragma as a form of love was popularized by the Canadian sociologist John Allen Lee in the 1970s, who described it as a mature, realistic love that is commonly found amongst long-established couples. Pragma is about making compromises to help the relationship work over time, and showing patience and tolerance. The psychoanalyst Erich Fromm said that we expend too much energy on “falling in love” and need to learn more how to “stand in love.” Pragma is precisely about standing in love—making an effort to give love rather than just receive it.

Philautia, or love of the self

The Greek’s sixth variety of love is philautia or self-love. And clever Greeks such as Aristotle realized there were two types. One was an unhealthy variety associated with narcissism, where we become self-obsessed and focused on personal fame and fortune. A healthier version enhances our wider capacity to love. The idea is that if we like ourself and feel secure in ourself, we will have plenty of love to give others (as is reflected in the Buddhist-inspired concept of “self-compassion”). Or, as Aristotle put it, “All friendly feelings for others are an extension of a man’s feelings for himself.”

When we think about all the different types of love defined by the Greek ancients we may have felt all of the above and possibly fortunate to have had the freedom to do so. However, there are many who live in countries where restrictions are placed on emotion or just a soul choice and that is why #FreedomFriday has become a place for those making their first steps to self-freedom, including love.

A voice for those who have the inability to express a ludus by dancing with an attractive person on a dance floor, or philia by hanging out with friends in a bar just enjoying each others company, or people staying in a long enough relationship to experience pragma. Out of fear these experiences can put a halt to our development too. All types of love are equally important to human development, and it is up to us to choose to experience them.

Love is a smoke made with the fume of sighs ^{William
Shakespeare}

Many of us have seen or heard such terms as “Love and Light” and as much as this may be a term many of us feel is over used it signifies a period in time where we are all choosing a path. What side will we take, will we fight for light or darkness? Even in the movie Wonder Woman, when she fights her god-brother and enraged from the death of her human companion, at thatbfinal moment she says “I choose love.” The knowing that light love is powerful enough to crush darkness.

Ultimately, love is a choice and if we want it we can have it, this is one of the gifts and choices given to us. One way to receive this love is by opening up our heart chakra and to be open to the experience. With balance and training we can all have healthy relationships and love.

To assist in the heart chakra opening meditation and practices such as yoga, tai chi, or qi gong are helpful. More importantly, while opening up pure love light into our Being is having a balanced self-love, which is the first step to giving free-love to others. With maturity the expectations of receiving the love back does not seem so important anymore because the love we give to ourself is enough. The rest is icing on the cake and is given back by the Universe in so many ways, we just have to be aware enough to see. The gift of a rainbow, a child’s laughter, a smile from a stranger, a kiss from a puppy ... we are being given freedom of love gifts every single day.

I would like to personally thank all my supporters of this initiative, #FreedomFriday and I send you out buckets of love. There is never enough to give or receive, we all go through a lot to make it in this world, but never forget we are not alone and we are loved. As always, I love community engagement, so please leave a comment below and I will be sure to respond.

Yours,

Eagle Spirit