May the revolution be inward, and its effects planetary; that's why I no longer smoke weed.

Birth place, birth family, time period in which you were born... these three conditions, upon entering the cycle of birth and death can be seen as blessings and/or challenges. In my case seemingly a blessing. Please do not get caught up in this term "blessing", nor in the belief of "cycle of birth and death" (reincarnation), for this essay is about something quite ordinary, marijuana addiction. Born a woman in the Bay Area of California during the 70s to Mexican and Mexican-American parents, I was educated in both private and public institutions affording me a path of choice. Choice to renounce social programming via schooling, religion, capitalism, media, I was able to live a life that seemed vital and free. What I did not realize was that a decade plus, daily habit encapsulated these "freedom-seeking" ideals into an addiction to bliss and idyllic scenarios.

Marijuana is a medicine. The de-criminalization of this herb in all forms is landmark and a necessary movement through out the world. It is here to help humanity heal. That is not what this essay is about. This essay is about my own relationship to escapism and how marijuana has run its course in my personal evolution.

Be Here Now, the book authored by Ram Dass in 1971 reads:
"Now, though I am a beginner on the path, I have returned to the West for a time to work out karma or unfulfilled commitment. Part of this commitment is to share what I have learned with those of you who are on a similar journey. One can share a message through telling "our-story" as I have just done, or through the teaching methods of yoga, or singing, or making love. Each of us finds his unique vehicle for sharing with others his bit of wisdom. For me, this story is but a vehicle for sharing with you the true message ... the living faith in what is possible. --OM--

These personal writings I share here on Steemit are meant to inspire others to stay the course, in faith, in Self-Realization, in sovereignty, in presence, in unconditional love.

While the world learns of the bounty and beauty of marijuana as it becomes legal, less stigmatized and openly acceptable, I will share with you the glimpses of freedom I now afford myself choosing not to alter my reality. The last day I used my vaporizer with a Sativa oil was May 25th, this year. I parked and was readying myself for my weekly Farmer's Market shopping. Super high functioning and blissed out I selected the yummiest and most fresh berries, citrus, greens and herbs. I was staying with my boyfriend at the time who is a recovering alcoholic and who didn't partake in marijuana. When I returned to his place we miscommunicated about some unmemorable topic and my high just disappeared, like that I was in an alternate reality, low and ungrounded. This was not the first or last time we would miscommunicate, but it was THE moment that I realized that the way I operated in life was escapist.

With marijuana, I created an amplified version of every experience, from mundane tasks to the already extraordinary and magical. Without marijuana I have an understanding of what being present is. I meditate. I sit in nature. I make sweet love. I breathe with awareness. The part of my unfoldment that gets me to that place of presence and union naturally, is what I wish to share here. No stimulants, only a willingness to witness what is there and learn that this path is not always "rose-colored" yet being at peace is possible. As I learn this, as within so without, on a first-hand basis I will share these "aha" moments as they are revealed. The way to change our planet is by changing ourselves. May the revolution be inward, and its effects planetary.