My word. What a beautiful post. Honestly, I had to re-read almost every paragraph because it was so rich.

I can very much relate to some of your stories about receiving shame from exposed childhood sexual experiences. It has been a real journey for me to reach down into that pit and reconnect with that boy.

The question is not, "How can I love all of me now?" The question is, "What part of me would most benefit from my love right now?"

I love the idea of tending to the parts of yourself most in need of that care.

And when you can own that, you'll see that every twist and turn of your past was a different cut in the prism of your perspective. Those cuts create patterns which light shines through and the entire spectrum of color fills the room. Without those cuts, the light would pass through you un-refracted and never show the deeper colors it contains.

I was struck with the idea of beautiful struggle a couple years ago and have tried to explore some of that in my own writing. This is my where I have gotten so far, but I am so encouraged by your writing here. Thank you for helping me go deeper in my own journey.