This wholefood vegan recipe makes four serves and has the potency of the toughest behind-the-counter drugs with none of the nasty side effects. [Yes, you'll need a high powered blender again.]

Cooked kale's been shown to have an extra kick to it.

I recently revisited the literature thanks to our beloved Dr. Greger (who shares the science for free, unlike the publishing journals who charge tens of thousands for subscriptions). I was reminded that kale's health benefits appear to be boosted when consumed cooked. Maybe it has something to do with breaking down cellular components through the heating process. I think there are a few questions still to be answered regarding the mechanism. This appears to be evidence against the notion that raw equals better.

While the raw foodies can certainly consume kale uncooked, I hope they're not doing that with eggs.

Holy shit. I used to drink "egg flips", which were basically cow's milk, white sugar, vanilla essence and a raw egg. Did I dodge many a salmonella-shaped bullet or what!? I won't blame my folks. They were well intentioned and well and truly blindfolded by the egg and dairy industry's lies. Dairy [and eggs] truly is scary.

I forgot to warn you about the pre-recipe rant [again]. Consider this an official apology.

We are all used to having traditional pumpkin soup that's basically cooked and blended pumpkin with some form of cream on top. I have seen popular vegan pumpkin soup recipes use coconut cream as a dairy substitute, and that's fine. Mum served it with sour cream. My vegan version uses cashews for that delightful creaminess for three reasons;

1. It's vegan.
2. It's a wholefood.
3. Cashews do NOT have saturated fat (coconut fat is a culprit).

None of the recipes I've seen use kale. Today was a pioneering breakthrough. Let's rejoice! Hurrah!

Alright. We've had our moment. I added kale. I didn't put penicillin into clinical trials. That thanks goes to Howard Florey, an Australian who has saved an estimated 200 million people with his work. I suddenly feel less important.

It's time to unpack the groceries, get any frozen goods into the freezer, finish up chewing that apple and prime your stoves, people!

The individual gobbly bits [ingredients].

• 1/3 cup raw cashews
• 1 cup soy mylk (Bonsoy is choice, but $$$)
• 1 butternut pumpkin [Hayley used the middle for something so technically I used about 3/4 of the pumpkin]
• 1 tight packed cup of kale
• 1 medium onion
• 1 tbs of garlic minced or fresh
• 1/4 tsp ground black peppercorns
• 1 tsp chilli flakes
• 1 tsp finely chopped fresh (or powdered) ginger
• 1 tsp dried thyme
• 1/2 tsp turmeric
• 1 tbs hemp meal or flax meal (linseed meal)

Cookin' and blendin' now! [Seriously easy]

• Add the cashews and soy mylk to the blender and set to speed eleven. You want the cashews to be unrecognisable. Put the hurt on them. Set aside.

Unrecognisable cashews. Foam and all.

• Chop the onion [speed 5 for 3 seconds], add the garlic and ginger and a couple of tbs of cashew/soy mylk mix and saute for a few minutes until translucent and soft.

• Skin and de-seed the pumpkin, chop it roughly and add to blender with the other ingredients.

• Tear up the kale, wash it under the tap and add to the mix with the pumpkin, garlic, onion and ginger. Add all other herbs and spices now (except for the hemp meal).

• Blitz for 20 seconds on speed 9.

• Add the remaining cashew/soy mylk and another 250 mL of water.

• Set your thermomix to 100 degrees C and cook for 20 mins on speed 1. If you're using a stove, just cook on high heat covered for 20 minutes until it's all soft and cooked through.

• If you didn't use a thermomix to cook your veggies, now's the time to pour back into your blender. Crank it up to max for 10 seconds and check your consistency. If you need it smoother, you know what to do.

Almost there!

Pour into a cute soup bowl and sprinkle on your hemp meal. At this stage you could try out a bit of nutritional yeast to give it a nuttier flavour. If you think it isn't salty enough, skip the salt and add a teaspoon of miso paste at a time (to the whole batch, not your bowl) and check the flavour. The salt consumed as miso has benefits and none of the circulatory system associated problems of plain added salt.

Whole plant-based food (WFPB) will change you. Embrace the new flavours and your new body.

I've always been thin. No doubt about it. While I could write an entire article about how annoyed I was with everyone telling me I was too skinny, I won't. They know who they are and probably aren't reading this. What a shame. While I was thin as a vegan last year, I still had odd lumps around my middle. Being flabby isn't just something that happens when you hit your thirties.

What I'll say is, you'll tighten up when you go WFPB.

What I mean by that is you'll lose the lumpy bits when you're smashing down fruit, veg, nuts and whole grains. I ditched the white bread and processed crap. Hayley's noticed my [albeit, tiny] pot belly disappear. While I'm not ripped, I've got abdominal definition. This is a person who doesn't do much else than attempt to get to 10k steps a day and do twenty or so push ups daily. I don't even do crunches.

The recipe ended ages ago. What're you still doing reading this part? A Netflix binge session beckons. Go on. Talk to you tomorrow.

All the best,

Nick.

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Disclaimer time;

This article isn't medical advice, was not self-upvoted nor have I been paid to promote any products or services.

However, if your family loves the food, give me the credit.