What NOT to say to a vegetarian

“You didn’t think we’d serve you a burger, right?! Here (hands me a bag with a croissant inside). This is for you.”

Music to my ears. Beautiful music to a vegetarian’s ears, to be specific.

I’ve been a vegetarian for 4 years now and so far, I have been enjoying it. When people ask me if I will stop being a vegetarian anytime soon, I would usually laugh at them. Being a vegetarian is not something I am just trying out for fun. It has made me appreciate food, how food is prepared, and the people who prepare food even more, so I don’t think I will stop being a vegetarian anytime soon. Well, except when I am in the presence of a juicy Jollibee Chickenjoy. It is true, it really is hard to resist the Chickenjoy.

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I will probably be blogging about my vegetarian journey next time. But, for now, I want to debunk three misconceptions that people have on vegetarians. I do not claim that I can speak on behalf of all vegetarians in the world, especially since I don’t personally know a lot of vegetarians. Additionally, vegetarians do not have the same reasons for choosing the vegetarian lifestyle, so these misconceptions may not even be applicable to them. But, in the off-chance that there is at least one person who resembles my or if you simply want to get to know me a little, then please, read on.

1. “You’re vegetarian?! How come you don’t look like it??”

This easily tops my list because as soon as I think about the annoying stuff people say about my being a vegetarian, this is what immediately comes to my mind. In fact, I don’t think this is only applicable to vegetarians. Change the word “vegetarian” to “on a diet”, “exercising”, “trying to live healthy”, etc. and it will probably illicit the same response too. What does that question even mean, right? Again, I can’t speak on behalf of all vegetarians, especially since I don’t know a lot of vegetarians. Vegetarians or vegans shoving their beliefs down your throat, now that’s equally annoying as well, and may be content for a different post. While I am not saying we should tolerate all the overly-whiny and hyper-sensitive people online who call people out just for the sake of calling people out, we obviously need to stand our ground when someone is asking a question that is hurtful and stupid. This is me standing my ground. This question is insensitive, most of the time. It may be better to rephrase this question to “You’re vegetarian? How has it been so far?”, which, I think, carries a more sensitive tone. “How come you don’t look like it?”, at this context, is a question that’s rude, especially when you don’t have a close relationship with the person to be asking this and meaning it to be a joke. First, we don't always know what another person is exactly going through. The person may be trying hard to be healthy (and thought that being a vegetarian is a decent first step), but the results have not been as evident yet. Sometimes we mean well, sure. But please, when we don’t have that kind of relationship with a person, please don’t go around spewing out your “well-meaning” questions. Second, the only person who can tell me this and can get away with it is my little brother. Others, I’d call out hard. So don’t even dare. Btw, I am usually nice and kind...when I am not hungry. Lastly, people

2. “Being a vegetarian is just a fad. Stop being pretentious.”

People really need to stop with all the hate. Just because a person tries something out, and that something happens to be trendy, doesn’t mean the person is trying it out for the sake of being relevant. Again, you will never know exactly what another person is feeling or what his/her reasons are for saying and doing something. Also, vegetables are a lot cheaper than meat, just saying. And yes, down to horrible capitalists who put such a sky-high price tag on vegetarian items which, in reality, should be really inexpensive in the first place. You make me sick!

3. “Let’s just go to _____. They offer salad there.”

This is one massive misconception about vegetarians and I am slamming this hard right now. Not all vegetarians like and enjoy salad, okay?. Case in point, ME. While I enjoy eating salad once in a while, being an Asian who grew up having rice in mainly all our dishes would always make me prefer rice and vegetables over salad any day. Again, maybe this is just me. I love loading on carbs alongside my veggies and non-meat protein but, don’t get me wrong, I still appreciate this suggestion.

Generally, please be nice to vegetarians. We have different reasons for choosing this lifestyle, and, most of the time, these reasons are valid. Please respect our reasons, and thank you for adjusting so we could all live in a more harmonious world. :)

My appeal to my fellow vegetarians, please be nice too. Don’t go around belittling people who have the above misconceptions. Don’t even go bossing people around and being all toxic when people can’t get food for you. Kindness goes both ways. When you can’t control the situation (e.g. The host of the event didn’t know you’re a vegetarian so they have no food for you), be nice and calmly respond to the situation. It may just be a misunderstanding, or a major lapse on somebody’s part, but either way, resolve the issue by communicating. For example, when I find myself in this situation, what I usually do is that I make sure I always have food (e.g. crackers, granola bar, bread, chocolate) in my bag. We need to learn to adjust too. We don’t always have a decent platform and ample amount of time to explain why we’re a vegetarian, so let’s adjust instead.