There are 2 types of confidence. Here’s the one that Jeff Bezos has—and why people judge you on it the most

There are 2 types of confidence. Here’s the one that Jeff Bezos has—and why people judge you on it the most

Confidence is one of those words that we use to mean different things without even realizing it.

One is what psychologists call “epistemic confidence,” or certainty. How sure you are about what’s true? If you say, “I’m 99% positive he’s lying” or “I guarantee this will work,” you’re displaying epistemic confidence.

Then there’s “social confidence,” or self-assuredness. When you’re in a group setting, do you act like you deserve to be there, like you’re secure in yourself and in your role? If you speak as if you’re worth listening to, you’re displaying social confidence.

Why social confidence is more valuable
We tend to conflate both types of confidence. It’s easy to picture, for example, a leader pumping up his team with an inspiring pep talk about how there’s no doubt in his mind that they’re going to succeed. It’s also easy to picture someone lacking in both types, stammering nervously, “Uh, I’m not really sure what we should do here.”

But epistemic confidence and social confidence don’t have to be a package deal. In fact, some of the most successful — and likable — people have more of the latter.

Just look at Jeff Bezos. In a 2012 blog post, Jason Fried, co-founder of Basecamp, recounts a time when the Amazon founder stopped by his company’s headquarters to do a Q&A session.

In one of his answers, Bezos shared an interesting insight: “People who are right a lot change their minds often.”

Individuals who embrace this type of thinking are often remarkably self-assured. Like Bezos, they are not afraid to express uncertainty, and they can hold a crowd’s attention when they speak.

Social confidence also involves how you carry yourself. Bezos’ big break came in the spring of 1996, when he received a visit from John Doerr, a partner at Kleiner Perkins — one of the most prestigious venture capital firms in Silicon Valley. Doerr left that meeting wowed by Amazon and ready to invest.

What exactly sold Doerr on Amazon?

“I walked into the door and this guy with a boisterous laugh who was just exuding energy comes bounding down the steps. In that moment, I wanted to be in business with Jeff,” Doerr said in an interview with Brad Stone, author of “The Everything Store: Jeff Bezos and the Age of Amazon.”

Doerr was also impressed with the ease of movement in Bezos’ technical proficiency. When he was asked about Amazon’s volume of daily transactions, and Bezos was able to pull up the answer with a few keystrokes, Doerr “swooned.”

Benjamin Franklin is another example. He was brimming with social confidence — famously charming, witty and ebullient. Yet he paired his abundance of social confidence with an intentional lack of epistemic confidence. It was a practice he had started when he was young, according to several of his biographies.

After noticing that people were more likely to reject his arguments when he used firm language like “certainly” and “undoubtedly,” Franklin trained himself to avoid these expressions, prefacing his statements instead with caveats like “I think...” or “If I’m not mistaken...”

Over time, Franklin became one of the most influential people in American history.