Pull The Trigger : Chapter 1

Maybe your whole life is a dream. The longest dream you have ever seen ... You will soon wake up and say, 'Wow it was the most interesting dream I've ever seen!' Maybe you're actually an orphan girl working in a textile factory. Really, would you like to be? Now right here, die on this rock and wake up as that poor worker girl. Do you want that?

Hi am Shito. I know that's not popular name. İt's Japanese. No, I'm not Japanese but it's long story. Don't worry, I will tell you my hole life. Let me start today...

 I'm sitting on a rock. I want to watch the peaceful calm of the sea. But in my mind, there is a voice laughing as I see this miserable state. The voice of my conscience that emerged years later. She does not leave me alone. What do I have to do to get rid of it? Why don't you shut the fuck up? Why did you come now? Where were you when people died? Your name may be conscience but it is not innocent of you. As long as I have the blood of the souls, at least your hand is infected. I pointed the gun at them. But you pull the trigger. 

Look at those normal people! I could be like them. If you never left me. Lovers, children, lonely people, old people and young people... Innocent and blind people. People who are not aware of anything around them. People who see the world bright. I used to hate them for their ignorance. But now I envy. I wish I was one of them. I do not see what they do not see, what they do not hear I don't too. I wish I was been like  them. Ordinary and unimportant... But unfortunately I am not like them and I will never be. The life I live is always going to follow me like a curse. Look at that young girl who kisses her lover. She thinks life is a game. She thinks that the morning begins with the birth of the sun, and the stars brighten the night. Yet she never met the darkness, never heard the screams that gave birth to the sun. She never saw death. How fortunate...

Death... The word of the angel is the fear. The word that should not be said. The word that brings the pursuit of pain and suffering. That's what most people think about death. However, death is quite ordinary and meaningless for people like me. The first taught rule when you start this job is "Not meaning to death, Not mission to yourself!" . For people like me, this is a philosophy of life. We like this rule. Just like me, they just don't think when they at work. Because the only thing that matters to this job is that the target dies. It does not matter who they are or how we kill the target. Only killing. Some of us kill to kill, not for money. Our lives are monotone, and killing is no more exciting than it seems. Sometimes we get tired of killing one and we take a vacation. A holiday,  that is endless and irreversible. But still life goes on, at least for some of us...

                                                               ( To be continued... )