Challenge #02212-F022: Companion Ship
A human finally finds a crew member who understands their sarcasm. -- Anon Guest
You have to be careful when you're a human around non-humans. Not all of them understand intonation, and just use your words. Sarcasm may be lost on the slow of mind, but it's also lost on those with different tonal coding to you. Worse - sometimes it's both.
Helpful hint to other humans like me who keep using sarcasm out of habit. Always point out why the sarcastic suggestion is the worst idea in the world. That way you have a passing chance that they'll realise you were mocking them. Also - resist the idea that they're messing with you. Galactic Society has taught assorted cogniscents that pranks are counter-productive. We're still learning about that if I want to be honest.
I thought my life was doomed to all of this until I met Hykko. They're a Ceratopsid Saurian type and a complete nerd about Humans and they've actually made the effort to learn about things like intonation inflections, ablaut reduplication, and all the weird-ass things that Humans do without thinking about it, especially once we have a handle on the lingo. I might be a little bit in love because I've been returning the favour by learning about their peoples as much as I can. They get me. I want to get them.
Poor Hykko's been more or less transformed into the Human Translator for the Mysti. It's actually called the Mysti Step but I'm not about to say that too often. The captain won it in a card game from a real bunch of nerds out by Puppis III, long story. Anyway, there are a lot of times when I say something without thinking about it and the entire damn conference of Alvokhan simultaneously turn to Hykko as if I was speaking in tongues. I'd be annoyed if it was me, but they still want to hang out with me so whatever, right?
Hykko understands my Human moments. I love it, and I think Hykko thinks they're at least entertaining. That's the vibe I get, anyway. Sure, translation duties wear on them, but I always shout them some treats after a long day. Working with Alvokhan is something of a grind on the best of days. I go through my chocco ration like bacon through a duck.
Hykko always volunteers Human board games as de-stressing opportunities when we have rec time together. Every time, it's a different one, and there's entire days when we just attempt to understand the dang rules. Like, I'm sure Parcheesi Squares is fun? But if the manual would look like an encyclopedia set in print, then forget it. Give me simpler stuff like Monopoly or chess. The rule set's right there. You don't need to look up subsection B, paragraph five, subheading whatever it was.
I'm going to ask them if they want to tune in to the Archivaas Entertainment Broadcast, this weekend. I heard they found a complete copy of the pre-shattering classic, Plan Nine from Outer Space. I can put out their concrete greens and if I'm lucky they'll bring chocolate for me.
Wish me luck. It might even be a date.
[Image (c) Can Stock Photo / Likozor]
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