No child should go to school in fear... (I disagree)
Today, I was called an insensitive bitch.
It could be true, I prefer to think of it as on-task and blunt.
Regardless, how it unfolded was there were several school meetings this week as we are close to the location of the Freeman School Shooting and it stirred up a lot of fear and angst. I totally understand this reaction and I think it is good to consider whether or not we are doing all we can to keep our kids safe. A concerned parent opened a local school meeting with a statement on children going to school in fear and how no child should attend school in fear. The conversation quickly turned to "No child should go to school in fear". (I am not ignoring, the horrifying issue of school shootings, it just isn't my primary point)
I thought about that for a moment and thought I have no way to control anyone else's fear. My kids sometimes feared their own bedrooms and fictional monsters under their bed. It isn't a rational problem to try to solve. If I were really honest, what I thought was the whole meeting was taking place to try and satisfy the fear of the parents. A person's fear is not an appropriate measure of whether or not a school is reasonably safe. So, I made the mistake of saying it. I also pressed the point by saying we can never be "sure" our kids are safe. Obviously, we are not ever safe, not even in our own homes.
I sometimes feel we live in a society of people who want to remove risk and negative emotions from life instead of live it.
We also often fear the wrong things,
The leading cause of dealth in teens is accidents, motor vehicle fatality is the leading cause of death to teenagers, representing over one-third of all deaths. *CDC 1999-1916
Motor vehicle accidents have been the leading cause of teen deaths for many years, and each year we tragically lose kids in our local area, I have never seen a parent meeting to talk about how to reduce risk, train better drivers, add safety equipment to teen-driven vehicles.
So many of our social reactions and laws are strictly based on fear.
I don't have any answers other than we always have to try to balance our fear and emotions with reality. We should try to base safety on what is likely to happen and not what can happen. We can not live this life in fear of what might happen, there are too many things that "can" happen.
What are your thoughts?
“Cowards die many times before their deaths; The valiant never taste of death but once." William Shakespeare
I wonder if this has anything to do with Shakespeare being taken out of the curriculum.
Fear is the rational reaction to something that can cause harm.
Phobia is the irrational feeling that you will be harmed by something otherwise harmless.
That said, there should be no reason a child should fear going to school.
The idea that we should keep our schools safe is a good one, but what good is a safe school if our children leave the campus to enter an unsafe world?
A shooter could easily wait in the neighborhood near a school even if we completely lock the school down and prevent any kind of weapon from entering the campus. It is an unfortunate fact that there are whackjobs out there who think shooting people is an acceptable response to whatever he or she is feeling.
Our children should be aware that there are dangers in the world they live in. They should treat people with respect and be vigilant in their perception of their surroundings. They should know what to do if there is an emergency or attack. To some degree, they should have a rational fear, and a plan of action for if that fear becomes a reality.
I agree that it sounds insensitive, but we unfortunately live in an insensitive world.
This is true until the "something" become "normal" then there is not fear anymore ... Like the car accidents.
Yes they should! But I do not see it so often lately, at least it does not look like parents are teaching that but the opposite. As @whatsup well says ...
I see this everyday in Germany, where I live.
Edit: What means "The idea that we should keep our schools safe is a good one"? What mean safe?
Edit 2: @whatsup you are a very sensitive "human bicht" ;)
Safe, in this context, means without controllable risk of injury or death.
The conclusion that you gave at the end is very true. We should never stop doing something just because we think something might go wrong or the fear of.
So being scared of something that may or may not happen is point less. That ruins all your moments leading up to that event. And just screwes with your peace all together.
This reminds my childhood experience.. Due to the 30 years old war we had in my country , I had to go to school with fear all the time. We never knew when the next bomb will go off. Several schools was targeted and we had to go through a lot.
I remember there was a check point in very school where they check our bags and body for bombs.
Luckily war is over now. But that experience effected our lives.
interesting post @whatsup
Cheers!
@whatsup - Oh my goodness, really sad to hear about that incident ma'm. One student died from that shooting :( I wish rest him peace.
Now kids are fear to go to school. Yes, Ma'm it can be happened after such kind of incident. Fear can't tolerate or can't transfer to someone else.
I'm praying and I wish those unfortunate situation will not happen again Ma'm. Hope school securities should aware about it.
God bless you & your family Ma'm.
Amen~
I am on your side. These parents are being irrational and expecting something from the school that is impossible for the school to provide. If these parents are so paranoid, why don't they hire a squad of security guards to constantly surround their children. Then the children will for sure grow up with issues! It's not normal to have that kind of constant fear. Better not get into any form of transportation and don't ever cross a street at grade. Those are all dangerous activities. Oh, and don't talk while eating either... you might choke! Geee... Some people....
i think school is training before live so we should have all emotions from there and all kind of experience because if in school will lack some kind of behaviour/emotions then after kids graduate then they will be owned hard by real life :)
I definitely see what you're saying. My kids' schools try to police "bullying." It's a natural way to establish a social hierarchy. I can't tell if it's the pure idiocracy of the public school system, the tyrannical government wanting everyone to forget how to stand up for themselves, or something in the water .(estrogen?)
Fear is an emotion that is used and abused, always has been, always shall be.
Humans may change (genetics) but human nature shall never change!
I am a prevention counselor at the school where my children study. We there watch for children who violate the laws. We try to influence, write them down in various circles, in sports sections.