My long journey to deciding to stay home with my kids

in #family7 years ago (edited)

Im going to give a little back story first, I was raised by a mom who always told me to never let a man take care of me financially because when my dad left it was a struggle for her to get on her own feet to support us. My sister showed us to always be strong and went to high school while taking us on as her responsibility while my mom worked and went to school. I had my daughter when I was in high school at 16 and I had to work nights to provide for her while I still went to high school during the day. So with that back story, I was always taught to not let a man take care of me financially and to bring in my own money.
When I had my first son with my husband I stayed home for a while and we decided we wanted another child and so I stayed home till I had my second son but a while after staying home with two little ones and having a daughter that was 9 almost 10, I felt like staying home was too much for me and I couldnt do it. I began working and quickly went from being a front office admin to being a satellite office manager but with that came a lot of hours but my husband was about to get out of the military and the hours were getting to me so I started to seek jobs that made more money. I found a job and went from associate to shift manager in the matter of months but once again it came with more hours, harder work, traveling every once in a while and was a more physical job then my last. I began missing my kids and needing more time home with my family. Little by little I began to see that I wanted to be with my kids and that they needed me more then my income but we would be super tight. My husband showed me that money isnt everything and we cut back everything that wasnt needed. I got offered by my friend to watch her son and it was perfect because it gave me an income and allowed me to stay home with my kids and also pick up the older two from school.
While watching him it taught me how stupid I was before and also broke my heart. My friend worked full time but also went to school full time and her son would miss her and not get any time with her but she was too busy to even notice how she was affecting her son, I felt horrible because I used to be the same way and never noticed how my kids probably felt the same way. Thats when I knew I needed to be with my kids and that I dont want them to ever feel like I am not there for them again.

I know its not an option for everyone but if it is please decide to stay home and be there all the time for your kids because they grow up so fast and you will never get back those moments you had missed or the feelings you caused them.
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