How to Survive a Cold Winter

Snow can create some mixed feelings for most. While it is nice to live in a winter wonderland that is even more impressive than anything Disney could ever come up with it is hard to forget it is also so cold that you wonder if it is even worth to bother getting out of bed. And some of you, who don't even get snow and cold weather, well this is a guide you can safely ignore unless you wish to learn more about the plight of the cold ones.

Get a Personal Warmer

You know, you deserve better than to be cold! So this season you will work your hardest on actually staying warm since you still think about your left pinkie you lost last winter. You might think that it could be a good choice to invest in another heater, maybe the money is worth it but think again! You will need the money for gifts as your sister will not speak for you the whole next year unless you give her four devilspawn sweet little angels proper gifts, that usually means the newest iPhones. How many phones do they need?! Can't they share? One of them is three years old for fricks sake! Remember, there are cheaper ways to stay warm. A lot of people feel lonely during winter, and cold, because they constantly get reminded of the fact that they have not married yet or had any kids like your stupid sister has somehow managed to get. This means that dating sites explode with new users who usually feel a bit too good for dating sites but are now feeling some dreadful desperation. Take advantage of that and get yourself a hottie that can keep you hot in turn. Cuddles and Netflix have never felt better and the way he keeps your hands warm outside is worth it even though he can only talk about his collection of vintage sneakers all the time. Like seriously, all the damn time. If you do not manage to bag a hottie you can always just cuddle with all your cats, which I bet you own a lot of already.

Alcohol and Friends

It is hard to find stuff to do during winter, that does not involve having to be outside for more than ten minutes. Thankfully, your friends will feel the same and the time for house parties is back! You will not even be bothered by the cold when you stand on the balcony pretending to smoke (like you didn't even light it but they are too drunk to notice that thankfully, you get to keep your cool points). Getting together with friends can, however, be a bit risky if you have some of the rare ones who actually do not mind getting frozen toes and fingers! While it can be hard to say no to a potential super fun skiing trip, remember that you do not own any winter wear, like at all, you spent all your money on gifts again. Stop being so nice.

Invest in Real Winter Wear Instead of that Cute Skirt

Okay, so apparently your sister will spend the holidays with her husband and his side of the family. This is actually great news as you now have four iPhones to return! While you thank yourself for always keeping the receipt your next thought might be that you can actually afford that cute skirt and leggings you have been eyeing this past week. Stop that! You will freeze even more and become one of those ladies you always scoff at for wearing basically nothing and then complain about being cold. You are better than that, and you deserve to be warm remember? While winter wear might not look all that flattering on you it is still better than to be one of -those-, even though I bet they are super nice! And you did not manage to bag a hottie, so why even bother with looks now? With a lighter wallet, you can now hang out with your super active cold-loving friends! Become one of the gang, be one of those who posts pictures on Facebook of you standing outside in the snow and not seeming to freeze at all? Some will think you are some kind of Superhero. This will be so worth it!

Stay Indoors

Well, that did not go as planned. Turns out that you actually have to plan ahead if you want to get a place to stay in that cool skiing town during its most popular season of the year. Your cool outdoorsy friends have now left town and your other friends have started to worry about drinking too much as they like to be social but there is literally nothing else to do but drink around here. So you are alone, your friends suck but... You do not suck lady! Not in a bad way! And now you can stay warm and do all those things you have been planning to do but not done since you'd rather hang out with others rather than yourself. Like knitting a super cute scarf, drinking hot cocoa while looking out the window and learn how to program. Some of those things are more important than others, just saying... Oh, you are just going to lay in bed with your cats and watch Netflix then? Okay...

Move to Different Country

This is a common tip in my guides but your family sort of canceled Christmas as "you are now too few since your sister is not going to be there" and all your friends are either away skiing or questioning their morals so what choices do you have? The best choice! It is time to move to a warmer, better place! Yes, may sound a bit drastic but remember, you deserve to be warm. And loved. Not only by cats. While you may not have that much money saved, you would still be able to sell your flat for a pretty hefty sum. And you will finally have a use for all those guitar lessons you had to go to as a kid as you can now become a street performer. You will not need a lot of money to survive as it will be warm and no need to buy presents, alcohol or winter wear! Also, just imagine all the hotties.

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