First Meeting with My Sister from Vietnam in Farmington, Michigan! Day 2!

For 33 years I thought I had two older sisters and a brother while my sister Thuy from Vietnam did not even know her father's name or anything about our family. After seven years of research and DNA tests, Thuy and her husband Mike found me and asked me to do a DNA test. Three months before this, my wife @laurabanfield had bought us DNA tests for Christmas from 23andme.com which we had not got around to using.

As soon as Thuy contacted me, I thought she was my sister. Oddly enough, the thought was more like I remembered something I had forgot long ago rather than learning something new. I sent the DNA test in right away.

Four weeks later we matched 21% which is a half sibling having one parent our father in common and the mother different. We talked on the phone for the first time a few days later. Thuy found the first available time she had off of her business and where her husband Mike had off of work to come visit where our father's family is from in Farmington Michigan.

In yesterday's post at https://busy.org/family/@jerrybanfield/meeting-my-sister-from-vietnam-in-detroit-day-1 I shared the day 1 of the journey here including my spiritual experience on the plane flight to Detroit and meeting @kenmelendez near the airport at https://steemit.com/steem/@kenmelendez/sjv4q4ch.

Today Thuy and I finally got to meet in person! The picture above is our first photos together uptown in Farmington, Michigan. We were planning to meet later in the day because I was having lunch with my cousin Alex beforehand at http://www.chivekitchen.com/ which is 100% vegan!

Two years of eating vegan left me interested in trying the vegan hot dog!

I forgot to get a picture of the salad before I finished it!

Alex took this picture of me sitting at the table which I thought looked artistic!

Just after Alex and I finished lunch, I got a message from Thuy saying she was there just across the street from us a few hours early to make sure they found it! We walked over and met her!

Thuy and Mike bought flowers for our Aunt Kathy which turned out to be our grandmother's favorite flowers. We then went over to Starbucks and talked for a few hours until Kathy met us!

We shared stories of our lives and childhood along with many hugs! From Starbucks we went down the street to the cemetery where grandma and grandpa are buried. When Thuy and I hugged there the experience reminded me of a soul bonding described in Miracles Happen: The Transformational Healing Power of Past-Life Memories by Brian L. Weiss and Amy E. Weiss. Our family's souls felt close to us and the energy of our bodies felt to be one without boundaries. During what was probably a twenty minute huge at the graveside, I managed to step on Thuy's foot several times to keep things down to earth. We hugged long enough in one position for my hand to start falling asleep.

After the cemetery, Thuy, Kathy, Mike, and I drove by the houses our family lived in and met Alex for dinner at http://www.buddyspizza.com/. With eating mostly a whole plant food diet consisting of about half raw fruits and vegetables with the other half of nuts, beans, and whole grains from the book How Not To Die, I was afraid that my options would be limited. Alex and Kathy reassured me that they made vegan pizza which I would like. As soon as I opened the menu I realized the eating would be great and started with what turned out to be a massive kale salad! I ate half of it without even putting on dressing on because I was so hungry!

Even with eating half the salad, I also ate the entire vegan four square pizza with pineapple, spinach, artichoke, roasted garlic, red peppers, and tomatoes.

Thuy, Alex, Kathy, Mike, and I enjoyed memorable dinner conversation in helping each other learn the family stories we did not know such as telling Thuy about our father's life and Thuy sharing about her childhood in Vietnam, coming to the USA, meeting Mike, raising her family, and owning her own business.

Thuy said she has another half brother in Vietnam according to https://www.familytreedna.com/ where I have not yet taken a test. Our guess is that he is on our father's side rather than her mother's because of the birthdays being so close. Over the last few weeks I had wondered several times if Thuy was the only one and my thought was that there was still probably a brother in Vietnam.

I will take the DNA test on https://www.familytreedna.com/ soon to see if I have any more siblings that I have not met yet!

When we finished dinner, we went to the race track at Northville Downs where our grandfather, father, and uncles spent many years of their lives racing horses. Dad told us hundreds of stories from that race track from winning $10,000 in a day there betting horses starting with only a few dollars to winning several races as a driver in one day to meeting my mother there. Apparently my birth ended his ability to win a horse race with his final win being the night before I was born 😃

While I generally avoid gambling after what was probably thousands of hours playing poker online in college and many trips to the casino after that, I bet a couple of horse races winning a net of $1.80 with one horse finishing third after I bet to win, place, or show. The picture above shows the last horse I bet coming in close to the back. The difference I noticed today in betting these horses was that without a sense of self in the bet and a desire to get high off of the win, placing a bet on the horses was devoid of emotion where I cared little about whether the horse I bet actually won.

We left the race track at about nine and went back to Farmington to say goodnight. Kathy intended to go into Starbucks to get a coffee quickly before the ride home but our plans changed as we walked by Coldstone where I thought we could stop in to see if there were any vegan options. It turns out a dairy free watermelon and lemon sorbet were available which led to the following desert.

This day leaves me with a clear message that I cannot comprehend all the possible opportunities for love and joy in the future that may be available to me if I am open for them. I am grateful I welcomed this experience because it is as helpful for me as for Thuy who after over twenty years of marriage to her husband finally was able to introduce him to her family for the first time today. For me, what a miracle to have a missing family member finally reconnected and the chance to just begin our earthly journey in this life together now!

What a great reminder today to love and be grateful for the people that are here! We have two more full days left on our visit here and intend to have more after we fly back to our homes on opposite sides of the country on Tuesday!

Thank you very much for sharing our journey with us! We hope this is helpful for you today because we know many more of us are separated from families or struggling to find gratitude for the ones we have or feeling like we are alone when really none of us is ever alone.

While we might be in the dark sometimes and we may endure hell for years among those that think they do not love us, we always will be reunited with our loved ones whether in this life and/or in the hereafter. Dad and his parents died without ever meeting Thuy in the flesh while today being present fully in spirit.

Love,
Jerry Banfield